Everything Else

Game #54 – No One Speaks English And Everything’s Broken, And My Stacies Are Soaking Wet – Hawks 2, Stars 4

By John Pullega 2291 0

Box Score

Hockey Stats

Natural Stat Trick

The Hawks, in the words of the inimitable Tom Waits, are a battered old suitcase to a hotel someplace, and a wound that will never heal. To the bullets.

– Brent Seabrook had a positively wonderful game tonight. His pass on Toews’s goal channeled 2013, and his purposely wide shot on Arty the One Man Party’s PP tally was a tangible example of the excellent passing we’ve always loved about him. Plus, his Corsi was a robust 67+ at 5v5. It’s no coincidence that he played the second-fewest minutes of all Hawks D-Men at evens, ahead only of Kempný. I don’t know about you, but even with the Hawks losing, I took solace in watching Seabrook play well. Like hot spiked cider on a cold, unforgiving winter’s night.

– The same can’t be said about Jordan Oesterle. He had a nice run coming out of the press box cold for a while, but the magic beans he’d been consuming to give him that extra giddy-up have gone stale. His turnover behind his own net let Stephen “One of the Ones Who Got Away” Johns do his best Russ Tyler impression, burying a knuckler—that Oesterle himself may have set the screen on—from the blue line for the Stars’s second goal in less than a minute. He also had a couple of miscues in the third that ended up not doing any direct damage, but did lead to extended pressure for the Stars early in the third with the Hawks down one.  Despite this, and his 44+ CF% on the night, he played more than anyone except Keith. This is your D-corps, folks.

– Anthony Duclair seemed half a step behind everything tonight. He whiffed on a wide-open shot off a Toews pass after stealing the puck from Pissbaby Benn late in the first. His turnover in his own zone led to the Stars’s first goal. From about midway through the second onward, he was a ghost. But his possession numbers were stellar (67+ CF%). He’s still got loads of potential and needs to stay up with DeBrincat and Toews, and eventually be re-signed.

– I want to be mad at Anton Forsberg, by my heart just isn’t in it. At the end of the day, he’s a backup goaltender on a team whose D-Men are either rapidly declining, still learning, or flat-out suck. There’s not much he can do on that first goal, with Radulov firing a perfect saucer pass to Tyler Seguin off the Duclair turnover. Having Oesterle screen him on Johns’s shot can sort of be forgiven. And yes, he needs to stop fucking Tyler Pitlick’s slapper at the end of the second. But then again, it’s perfectly fitting that a guy named Pitlick would score the game winner against the Hawks tonight, isn’t it?

– Connor Murphy started the game on the top pairing and looked pretty good doing it. His CF% of 54+ was inspiring. But he was on the ice for two goals. You can argue that he took a bad angle on the first goal, but given how often he’s been flipped and jerked around this year, it’d be a stretch. And we all saw the third goal: That’s on Forsberg. You’d like to see him get more time with Keith, but with the defensive carousel that Q is throttling into overdrive, it’s impossible to tell.

– Erik Gustafsson looks more like a 5-6 D-Man every night. He’s got decent vision with his passing too, at least when Kane’s on the ice with him. I’d be interested to see him with one of Rutta or Kempný at some point.

– David Kampf probably has a future as a bottom six defensive center. His stick checking was pristine tonight, and he won a few board battles to show off his strength.

– It was nice to see Toews score tonight. He also had a 73+ CF%. But he missed a yawning net in the first off a pass through the Royal Road from DeBrincat, either because he wasn’t expecting the pass or because his skate got caught. Microcosms.

– The chocolates and flowers for Tommy Wingels tonight were a bit much. Foley, Jammer, and Burish barely had time to come up for air between all the kisses they blew at him for TROWING HITS OUT DERE. He had one good hit in the third that separated the puck and drew a penalty, but other than that, I don’t get it. He janked an uncontested rebound off the far post and did nothing other than hit guys the rest of the night. I understand the frustration over this team this year. I understand that we don’t really have any answers. But this whole DA FIRE AND DA PASHUN garbage is already wearing thin. Hits have never been the answer for this team, and they sure as shit aren’t the answer now.

– Brandon Saad did not have a good game, again. He logged a 48+ CF% with Schmaltz and Vinnie. He did set up a few good chances that went unanswered. Like all of you, I want to see him come out of his funk. He’s probably best served playing with Schmaltz and Kane again, but I get how it can be hard to justify it right now. At the end of the day, he’s a good player having both a down and unlucky year.

As it stands, this season is circling the drain. As it stands, the Hawks have good young talent on the front lines but not the back end. As it stands, without Corey Crawford, this team doesn’t have the firepower to make the playoffs.  It’s frustrating, it’s out of the ordinary, and it’s hockey, baby.

Onward.

Boozes du Jour: Jefferson’s whiskey into High Life back into whiskey.

Line of the Night: “HIT SOMEONE.” –Adam Burish on how the Hawks could overcome a 3–2 deficit in the third (I usually love Burish, and I get the frustration, but it’s lazy).

Everything Else

Now Here Is Nowhere

By Sam Fels 2709 0

Last night’s frustrating loss whipped up a little more vitriol and angst than previous losses have. Perhaps it was the manner, as the Hawks did play well, couldn’t finish, and were on the donkey end of a couple calls (one not egregious, one that really defies belief). Still, the Hawks only scored one goal that mattered, really none at even-strength, and you’re going to get what you get when you do that. Which is not much and basically a handful of yourself.

And while it hurts to say, given the results everywhere else it’s left the playoff hopes in tatters, and now the Hawks are going to need something bordering on miraculous to even get back into the discussion. Which means the knives are coming out, and that means people want guillotine fodder.

It’s understandable. While I don’t think anyone expected this team to repeat last year’s regular season, this has been a disappointment. The injury to Crawford has been more crucial than anyone wants to admit, because no one wants to admit their team hinges so heavily on a goalie. But the Hawks are hardly alone in this. If Pekka Rinne weren’t having a renaissance season at 35 the Preds would be way off where they are, because they really haven’t been a good defensive team yet this year. The Jets and Hellebuyck. Vegas and their rotating cast of clowns. When the Kings were riding high it was because Quick was throwing a .940 at the league. Even Tampa, the best team in the league, has Vasilevskiy as a Vezina leader. Rask has lifted Boston. This is just how the league works now.

But that’s not enough for a lot, and I don’t know that they’re wrong. People want the house cleaned, and that’s both GM and coach.

Our feelings on the coach are well-known at this point, so let’s save that for a bit later. When it comes to any possible firing of Stan Bowman, one has to ask what the expectations for him and the team really were, not what they said they were, and what mistakes you’re firing him for.

If Stan is truly, and being allowed, to try and engineer a rebuild on the fly and the results this year aren’t quite as important as next season’s or the one after that, you’d have to say his results at worst are just on the positive side. Nick Schmaltz has proven to be a bonafide #2 center in this league. Alex DeBrincat looks to be a future top line sniper, with a dash of vision thrown in. The Connor Murphy trade was a good one, whatever his coach or blinded local media seem to think. Vinnie Hinostroza and David Kampf look like they can be bottom-six contributors on a good team.

Yes, Brandon Saad has disappointed. Maybe that could have been scouted out in Columbus, because he did do this at times there, too. But the thought was that being back in Chicago and on the top line would reinvigorate him. Stan was hardly the only one who thought that. Other than Kane, the other veterans have not performed up to their usual standards. But what was the alternative there? They’re going to be here until they retire.

Ah, this is where the discussion begins. Brent Seabrook’s contract. Ok, let’s have it. Let’s go back in time. Even if I were to grant you that Seabrook’s extension was all Stan’s decision, and I won’t, remember when this contract was signed. Three months after a third parade. It would have taken quite the tires for any GM to let Seabrook go into the last year of his deal, after he was a major, major cog in a third triumph (and you forget how good he was that spring) and then simply let him walk. Or better yet, trade him right after the confetti had fallen to the Soldier Field ground or during the season. I can’t think of a precedent for it. Yes, you might point to the purge after the first Cup, but there was no alternative there. And all of Ladd, Byfuglien, Sopel, Versteeg, even Niemi, were more contributors than cornerstones. Seabrook was a cornerstone. Yes, the Penguins let Trevor Daley walk after two Cups. Trevor Daley also sucks and always has. You’ll notice they probably overpaid for Justin Schultz. They’ve hinted at trading Kris Letang, which would be a comp, except he’s been fragile his whole career and wasn’t even part of last year’s run. Seabrook was neither of those two things at the time.

Yes, perhaps Stan could have played more hardball (again, if this was up to him). Maybe he could have gotten less years on it, but that probably only raises the AAV. And quite simply, hardball negotiations are not something the Hawks do. They’re terrified of it. That’s why they traded Saad the first time instead of waiting him out and imagining an incoming offer sheet that simply was never going to happen. It’s why they’ve twice handed Toews and Kane extensions well before their deals were up that were probably higher than they had to be. It’s why Crow got his deal, though man does that look like a bargain now. They just don’t do it. Their first priority, it seems, is to be seen as THE player-friendly organization.

Stan’s biggest mistakes were losing Teuvo, Johns, and Danault for essentially nothing (though the latter was in a go-for-it trade that simply didn’t work). Even if we accept they had to go, you can’t lose young players like that for nothing in return. And that’s the ground that Stan is trying to make up. I would argue that he had to lose those players to pay other ones to please coach and president, but I won’t be able to prove that until someone writes the tell-all book in about 10 years.

Another thing Stan is working against this campaign is that due to the NHL’s incomprehensibly stupid cap-recapture penalties, he wasn’t really allowed to do anything with Hossa’s money. The Hawks chose not to use the LTIR money in the summer so they could have flexibility during the season, and that’s understandable. What’s not is that they had to make that decision at all. Hossa’s contract was not against the rules when signed, so why should any team be punished for that after the fact? The blame could go to the players’ union as well here, who simply lied down and accepted this ridiculous rule without any fight.

If Hossa could have simply retired and freed up the money, which he should have been able to do, it’s not like the last free agent class was staggering but there were players who could have helped, whatever the aims of this season. Bonino? Shattenkirk (was only going to the Rangers but you get it)? Radulov? Hainsey? Kulikov? Varying degrees here, but clearly some if not all would have helped. The Hawks couldn’t do any of it because of cap-recapture. That seems like a pretty big obstacle.

If you’re firing Stan, it’s for either not starting this rebuild-on-the-fly in the immediate aftermath of a Cup, which seems just about impossible. Or you’re firing him because you don’t like where this is going, and as stated above that’s not correct. Or you’re firing him because players got old.

I’m not saying this roster turnover is going to work next year or the one after, and then it won’t matter anyway, I don’t think. But if indeed that’s what’s going on here, Stan should get to see it to its completion. And if that falls short, then I give you permission to fire him.

Everything Else

Angry at Numbers: Murphy Go Down on the Merry-Go-Round

By John Pullega 2728 0

This post is not a referendum on anyone’s play last night. Last night was a decent effort by most, muddled by the NHL’s complete refusal to clarify what its own rules are, and peppered with the missed chances, lack of finish, and poor shooting percentages that have become the norm around here. What this post aims for is to figure out why guys like Kempný and Murphy seem to get scratched for no reason that makes sense, while our favorite whipping horse gets the ice despite his performances.

If you look at just last night’s numbers, it might make sense. Seabrook had a good possession game. But he also took a confounding boarding penalty that put the Hawks 5v3. He also couldn’t chase down Sean Monahan with the goalie pulled, allowing him to slide home the dagger. But those kinds of things are exactly why having Murphy sit yesterday and Kempný sit the game before seem so frustratingly random. If either of those two had been in Seabrook’s position, either on the penalty or the Monahan goal, is there any doubt that we’d need police dogs to start the search for them?

Now, the organ-I-zation wants you to believe that Murphy was “sick” last night, which explains why Crawford isn’t currently skating, why they pulled Toews off the ice immediately after his dizzy spell in 2012, and why they aren’t mentioned in the Montador suit. Because player health has been a top priority for this organization. You know how this looks by now.

While I may be an angry man, I can also be a reasonable man. So I decided to parse out some numbers to see whether Kempný or Murphy really deserved to sit over Seabrook. I looked at a few things over the last five games to see which trends I could snuff out. These stats do not include yesterday’s game.

I looked at each player’s total time on ice and the lines he played against primarily in each of the last five games. Then I compared his CF% against just that line to his total CF% for each game. Finally, I looked at the percentage of faceoffs he took in the offensive zone during the game, and logged how many goals he was on the ice for, just for fun.

First, I looked at Kempný.

* = Got domed by the Johansen line (42+)

Looking at the first two games, the raw numbers suggest that Kempný wasn’t playing that great. His full-game possession shares were below water, despite starting in the offensive zone a vast majority of the time. During these two games (and the next game in Nashville), Kempný tended to play most of his time with some combination of Sharp/Wingels–Anisimov–Hartman, otherwise known as the Smykowski line. He did well with them in Toronto (getting crushed behind the Toews and Schmaltz lines) and horribly in Detroit.

But look at the Nashville game: Against the Turris line—which, aside from Hartnell, is usually Nashville’s second line—he posted a 57+ CF%. What dragged him down was the Johansen line, and he was far from the only Blackhawk to deal with that problem. Recall that Quenneville purposely kept Toews away from the Johansen line as much as he could on the road, and that the Johansen line had a collective 60+ CF% for the game. It’s hard to be upset about what Kempný did there, especially with the shit zone starts.

The fourth game against Vancouver was a relative rebirth. He played most of his time against Vancouver’s top line and completely skulled them. The poor zone starts had little to no effect on his possession share, as he and Murphy led all Hawks D-Men in possession. Additionally, this was a game that saw Kempný backing up DeBrincat–Toews–Duclair just about as often as he did Wingels–Anisimov–Hartman.

After that game, by far the best of the bunch, Quenneville scratched Kempný. He was on the ice for one 5v5 goal through four games.

And what of Connor Murphy, the most consistent Hawks D-Man over the last few months?

* = Faced 4th line of Komerov–Moore–Kapanen at nearly the same rate of time for a 75 CF%

^ = Got domed by the Johansen line (42+)

~ = Tkachuk–Backlund–Frolik each had a CF% of 50+ against ALL Hawks except Jurco, Gustafsson, and Seabrook

Like his partner, Murphy had a rough go of it against Toronto. The Bozak line pushed him crotch-first into the corner of an end table. But the other line he played against at about the same rate of time, the Komerov line, got slimed by Murphy, with Murphy coming out with a 75 CF% against them.

He turned it around in Detroit, pasting the Larkin line despite a huge lead. This may seem odd, since he and Kempný were paired up throughout the game, but I think there’s an explanation. While both Kempný and Murphy found themselves behind the Smykowski line most often, Murphy backed up the Schmaltz line as his secondary forward line, whereas Kempný backed up the Kampf line. Given how Q tends to use those two lines (Schmaltz’s in the offensive zone as much as possible, Kampf’s as a Kruger Lite), it might explain the difference.

Murphy fared more poorly overall against Nashville, but for the same reason as Kempný: Johansen’s line ate everyone’s lunch. And when you consider the putrid offensive zone–start rate and the opponent, that game makes more sense in terms of possession.

Like Kempný, Murphy had his best game against Vancouver. But then Calgary happened, which saw Murphy get creamed by Calgary’s 3M line to the tune of a 17+ CF%. And while the overall CF% isn’t pretty either, especially considering the decent offensive zone starts, it bears mentioning that the 3M line had at least a 50 CF% against everyone except Jurco, Gustafsson, and Seabrook.

There’s no doubt Murphy had a bad game in Calgary, but relative to the team, it’s not as bad as it seems. It’s certainly not scratch-worthy in my view, unless you’re blaming the game-tying turnover entirely on him and believe that’s a scratchable offense. That seems a bit too punitive to me, but Murphy’s been Darkness to Q’s Rick James since he got here.

He was on the ice for two 5v5 goals through five games, and was “sick” last night (OF DIS TEAM, YA KNOW WHAT I’M SAYIN’?).

And then, there was Seabrook.

* = Got buried by the Baertschi–Horvat–Boeser line (18+) and the Sedin–Sedin–Virtanen line (40)

^ = Split time against two lines.

This is where it gets frustrating, because none of Seabrook’s numbers justify sitting Kempný or Murphy over him. Against Toronto, Detroit, and Vancouver, Seabrook had decent-to-plush zone starts and garbage possession. In the one game he played the fewest minutes of any D-Man, the Hawks dominated. And if we’re going to claim that Murphy should have been scratched for Calgary’s game-tying goal (he shouldn’t have), then the goal Seabrook fell down for against apparent-future-Hall-of-Famer Brendan Gaunce ought to be grounds for banishment to the center of the sun.

Compounding this problem is that in the four games prior to Calgary, he found himself behind the Schmaltz line. And we know what happens when those guys lose the puck. So in an effort to shield him, Quenneville also managed to set him up to look foolish, which he often did.

Anyway, the first Flames game was an odd mishmash regarding whom Seabrook saw at 5v5. While he spent the most overall time against the Mangiapane (2:55)–Bennett (7:04)–Brouwer (6:19) line, he also saw a not-negligible amount of time against Gaudreau (5:06)–Monahan (4:22)–Ferland (4:49). The Johnny Hockey line also saw the most time against Keith–Oesterle by a long shot, which makes me think that any time Glen Gulutzan’s trust-fund face could chase matchups, he was sending his best at Gustafsson–Seabrook. Ironically, Seabrook held his own against Johnny Hockey & Co. better than against the Bennett Brouwer line. But over all five games, Seabrook was on the ice for five 5v5 goals.

Perhaps most damning are the WOWY numbers for these three over the last five (or four in Kempný’s case). Away from the Smykowski line, Kempný and Murphy consistently logged CF%s of 52+ to 54+.

Seabrook’s numbers with the Schmaltz line cut two ways in terms of bad. In the 31+ minutes he’s played with the Schmaltz line (with Saad on the left side), the entire regiment has had a 35+ CF%. Conversely, Gustafsson and Seabrook have a 57+ CF% away from the Schmaltz line. It’s almost like that line and that pairing don’t belong together.

And that’s not even getting into Gustafsson’s WOWY with Seabrook since he’s been called up (46+ WITH Seabrook, 58+ WITHOUT), or the fact that Gustafsson and the Schmaltz line have a 100 CF% in their four minutes away from Seabrook over the last five. That’s probably more of a sample size mirage, but it makes you wonder.

In short, it’s hard to find a statistical reason to sit Kempný or Murphy over Seabrook. It would make at least some sense to rotate Seabrook and Rutta, given their similarities in style and handedness, and since Rutta looked good by the numbers against Calgary the first time (54+ CF%). Instead, we’ll watch Q and Ulf trot Seabrook out like he’s Blood Sugar Sex Magik, even though he’s decidedly not that anymore, in the name of genius, leadership, or whatever other White Castle fart excuse they can find to justify this journey toward mediocrity in 2018.

Stats from NaturalStatTrick.com

Line rankings & positionings from dailyfaceoff.com, with cross-referencing on NaturalStatTrick

Everything Else

Game #48 – We Need New Pornos. Guess I’m Still Writing – Hawks 2, Leafs 2 (Leafs Win Sap Boil)

By John Pullega 2298 0

Box Score

Hockey Stats

Natural Stat Trick

Do you remember wanting to do a fatality in Mortal Kombat II on Sega Genesis, but the combo was 15 buttons long and you were fucking 10 so you couldn’t finish it on time? That’s what this game was. To the bullets.

– Brent Seabrook had an eventful game. Like a post-binge-drinking shit, it started off nice, then turned into a wet pile of unidentifiable slop. The PP goal was a thing of beauty, the half-assery on the missed icing call can be forgiven, but after that, I sat wondering where all that $7 million leadership we keep hearing is so integral to the Hawks’s success was. I wanted so badly to write about what a great game he had—because early on it was good and I want him to turn it around so bad—but in a microcosm of his year, he managed to back down from a strong start and settle into a disappointing finish.

I’m not here to blame the outcome on Seabrook, but it’s hard to argue against the idea that the air came out of the team after the Leafs’s first goal. If the organ-I-zation is going to justify suiting up Seabrook by pointing to his leadership, that botched call is a perfect spot for him to showcase it. Instead we get a whole lot of yelling at the linesman and a report from whoever’s filling in for Pierre that there’s no talking, no urgency on the bench for the Hawks at all. I don’t want to get too sucked in to things that we can’t quantify, so I’ll borrow a line from Q and say I want MORE from Seabs there.

– The first PP goal was a case study in why setting up behind the net is typically a good idea. Credit Wide Dick for swallowing the faceoff impasse, and Schmaltz and Vinnie for having the wherewithal to move the puck behind the net. Vinnie’s awareness on Seabrook’s positioning gave Seabrook all the time in the world to do one of the things he’s always been good at, and he buried the shot off a deflection.

– Speaking of Vinnie, we may have a new candidate for the Kris Versteeg position. You can credit him for the Hawks’s second PP goal, when after what seemed like a decade, he fulfilled every 300-level meatball’s dream (I include myself in this description) and simply shot the puck at the net. One bounce, one Anisimov sweep through the crease, and one inability for the NHL to make the rules regarding goaltender interference clear to even the referees let alone the fans later, Schmaltz had tied the game. The way this team has played, you would have felt safe betting that Vinnie would try to throw the puck to an empty spot on the ice, but he didn’t. On top of that, he exploded from that point onward, setting himself and Keith up for few nice opportunities that they just couldn’t finish. Same as it ever was. Same as it ever was.

– DeBrincat–Toews–Duclair did everything but score, which at this point isn’t just a cute saying. It’s becoming increasingly obvious that when given linemates who aren’t medically required to masturbate with down-lined gloves, Alex DeBrincat is quite the playmaker. He and Duclair had several anus-clenching instances in the first and second periods where the pass was either just a fraction too slow, the angle was a bit too sharp, or Andersen simply had a play to make. If Toews can be bothered to set his internal clock to the same time as everyone else instead of assuming he has more time than he does, I can see this line destroying the Earth, which means Sharp and Bouma will be with Toews tomorrow.

– I want to say I’m getting itchy about Saad, but it might just be angst at this point. The underlying numbers are strong and he’s still a force in transition. But he’s on pace for a mere 40 points this year, which would be the lowest he’s had since his 27 during the Season In A Can. I like the idea of him with Schmaltz and Kane, but after the first period, that line seemed to fade into the background a bit. This is less a call for change and more a vain cry of desperation for the Man Child to pull a Hossa and carry the team.

– Through the first 14:44 of the game, the Sharp–Anisimov–HEART MAN line had a 0 CF%. They bumped it up to 30–20–30 by the end of the period and ended the game with a 50–40–50, but that doesn’t really answer what this line does. This isn’t a complaint so much as a resignation that the depth just might not be there for the classic 3-and-1 setup the Hawks like to run.

– The Jurco–Kampf–Vinnie line is the Hawks’s Autobahn, in that they go really fast just because and put punctures in your furniture from the grip you have to hold when they’re out there. Kampf also saw extended time on the PK and didn’t look horrible doing it. If I were a gambling man, I’d bet on Kampf being Quenneville’s Kruger going forward.

– Glass Jeff was fine for a guy who’s spent most of his career flying through nine time zones to play hockey. You get what you get with him, and there’s really no excuse for losing games against the Ning and the Leafs when he allows just two goals apiece. It’s hard to get mad at him for the shootout diaper crapping, because without a top-tier goaltender, shootouts are a crapshoot.

– I’d like to dedicate an entire bullet to what a gigantic, braying, shitting horse’s ass Mike Milbury is. I don’t know who finds his “back in my day” drunk-uncle schtick charming, but this dinosaur-riding assnose is the pinnacle of insufferable. Anyone who enjoys or even tolerates his continued employment as anything other than “guy who gets stuck in a porta potty while people who are somehow lesser-rank assholes tip it over” ought to be drawn and quartered. He couldn’t wait five minutes, and I mean that literally, before implying that the Hawks lost the Hjalmarsson–Murphy trade. The fact that this rockhead has the mental faculties to imply anything at all would be impressive if the thing he were implying weren’t categorically false. What an outrageous and unabashed dickhead.

It’s hard to get mad about games like this because this is kind of what the Hawks are this year. They managed a point when they needed two, but some of the younger guys—Schmaltz, Duclair, Top Cat, Kampf, and Vinnie Smalls—looked more or less good doing it. This season may not be what we wanted, but there are still bullets in the chamber. Whether they fire them this year or next is anyone’s guess.

Beer du Jour: High Life for this low life.

Line of the Night: Mike Milbury implying the Hawks would be better with Hjalmarsson than Murphy. I’m not dignifying his actual words by going back and listening to them again. Fuck him.

Everything Else

Asked for a piece of mine, you charged me for it

By Adam Hess 2980 0

One of the more ironic things about Chicago sports is how often the teams in this town get referred to as “storied franchises” despite most of them not really having great stories. Run down the list and not a single of the major sports teams in the city have won more than six championships in their given sport, and only the Blackhawks and Bulls have shown any level of world dominance style success in anyone’s recent memory (the Cubs may get there, but please don’t try to convince me they’re already there).

I am normally an overly optimistic sports fan when it comes to my teams, so it’s been kind of a weird juxtaposition for me to hold the belief that my favorite teams are “destination teams” for players while also realizing they don’t quite have the history to back up that belief. Add the fact that the various ownership and management groups of the Chicago franchises don’t have the best track records – especially among fans – and maybe Chicago sports franchises have a reputation they haven’t quite earned.

Which is why I was intrigued by this poll posted on Twitter by Cheer The Anthem last week:

It’s a very clouded question, because outside of Theo/Jed, Chicago’s  sports teams really have very questionable front offices. GarPax chased an elite player in Jimmy Butler out of town rather than ever making a real effort at building a championship team around him, so I’m not in the least bit surprised that they were low on the list. Even as a White Sox fan I was surprised Rick Hahn finished so high, because the question was referencing the last three years, and not just one. Hahn couldn’t build a winner around Chris Sale, Jose Abreu, Adam Eaton, Jose Quintana, and other young, controllable players, so one year of very good trades only makes up for so much of that.

Honestly, I voted for Ryan Pace, not because I think he’s done an incredible job with the Bears in the last three years, but because he’s the only GM on the list who has his team essentially where he expected to have them three years ago, and the Bears seem to be headed in the right direction. Again, I’m an optimist.

But honestly, I think the fact that Stan Bowman won the vote there is kind of laughable. Now, I know the list isn’t exactly stuffed full of incredible GMs, but Bowman has been damn near pitiful over the past three years. Second City Hockey has made posts tracking the major moves Bowman has made over the past three years, so I went back and reviewed those lists (see them here – 2015, 2016, 2017), and basically rated them as either Good, Whatever, or Bad using entirely my own opinion. This was actually pretty easy, and I think most people would probably agree with my evaluations.

For brevity I won’t post my rating for every single transaction, but here’s how it shook out – 2015 had seven good moves, seven whatever moves, and eight bad moves, so I’d chalk that up as a “whatever” year that leans a bit toward bad. The good moves included signing Artemi Panarin, the Brandon Saad trade, and re-signing Anisimov. The bad moves included the Brent Seabrook extension, Patrick Sharp trade, and the David Rundblad extension. Seriously, the Seabrook extension was so bad, even when it was signed. The nearly $1-million raise for an aging player, plus the max term, and the full NMC, all when StanBo wasn’t even negotiating against anybody. Just embarrassing, and it clearly hasn’t aged well.

The moves made in 2017 were mostly “whatever” moves, and I didn’t actually rate anything as bad. The two moves that I consider especially good were the Scott Darling trade and Panarin/Saad swap. The Darling trade was pretty much masterful work, because to get a third round pick for a guy that otherwise would’ve walked for free is a really good move. The other big move of the year, the Hjalmarsson/Murphy swap, I graded as Whatever, which is probably bad, but Murphy has been fine this year and there is time for that move to pan out. And Stan started 2018 off right with a pretty good deal on Wednesday night, swapping Richard Panik for Anthony Duclair, making his team younger and faster while also saving cap space.

In the middle of all of that was 2016, which rated out with four good moves, four bad moves, and eleven whatever moves. But don’t let those numbers fool you, 2016 was awful for Bowman, and really could end up proving as the year that ultimately un-did all that he had built up here in Chicago. The best move he made was trading Andrew Shaw for two draft picks, one of which became our Special Boy Top Cat. The next best move was trading Jeremy Morin for Richard Panik. Panik hasn’t been awful, but that move is hardly anything to write home about. I also rated re-signing Q as good, so if you wanna take that out since it isn’t directly roster related, there’s only three good moves. But the bad moves were very, very bad.

Starting with the Andrew Ladd trade, which basically undid most of the goodness of the original Brandon Saad trade. Marko Dano hasn’t quite delivered on some of the promised potential, but I think his game was well suited for the Hawks’ style, and there’s a chance that had he been afforded more playing time with the Hawks in Chicago, he’d be a serviceable-or-maybe-good forward for them now, and probably at least better than the likes of Tommy Wingels or Lance Bouma. Plus the Hawks also gave up a first round pick in the deal. From the moment it was completed, it was a trade that was going to need a Cup to justify it. But Ladd brought them basically nothing worth mentioning down the stretch of the season and the Hawks were bounced by St. Louis in the first round. Little did we know this might have been the first domino that started the downfall of the Hawks “dynasty.”

Then there was the Philip Danault trade, which basically made the eventual overpriced Marcus Kruger contract extension not just necessary, but really Stan’s only option if the team was gonna have any semblance of a checking line in 2016-17. Trading Danault – who was already a very promising defensive forward with the potential to be Kruger 2.0 but with a bit more offensive upside – and other assets for Tomas Fleischmann and Dale Weise proved to be another big mistake. Weise and “Flash” were supposed to provide enviable forward depth for the Hawks as they prepared to go on a run to repeat as Cup champs. Instead they, like Ladd, didn’t provide much worth mentioning and were gone in the summer. Danault has gone on to be good bottom six forward for the Habs, with 22 points in 42 games this year and a CF of 54.56%. Ho hum.

But the real killer came in the summer with the trade that might end up defining Stan Bowman’s time as Blackhawks GM even more than his rebuilding of the team for the two Cup wins, at least in the minds of most of the hooligans who write words on this website. We always knew trading Bryan Bickell was going to be hard, and definitely was going to require some sweetening. It shouldn’t have required sweetening in the form of Teuvo Teravainen. Teuvo isn’t exactly a generational talent, but he’s been very good for Carolina over the past year and a half. He posted an encouraging 42 points in 81 games last year, and has been on a tear this year with 33 points (11G, 22A) in 41 games. He’s also posted a 55.69 CF% this season. That kind of production and possession dominance would be huge for the Blackhawks this year, but instead we have to watch the NHL Twitter account continually tweet videos of the original Very Special Boy do good things for the fuckin Hurricanes. AND I JUST GOT A TEUVO JERSEY LIKE A 10 MONTHS BEFORE THAT. I will not forgive Stan for this.

Now, every GM is prone to bad moves, and probably even prone to a series of them from time to time. Peter Chiarelli has chased bona fide stars away from his teams more times than we can count, and Jim Benning has only made like one good deal so far during his tenure in Vancover. But what Stan Bowman did in 2016, in essentially two trades, was plant a fucking iceberg in the path of the Titanic ship he had built. Again, imagine what this team would look like with Teuvo and Danault in tow instead of Wingels and/or Bouma. That kind of legitimate forward depth would help make up for a lot of the shortcomings on the Hawks embattled blue line, and probably have them closer to being a contender than a last place team.

And look, I don’t mean to say that Stan is a bad GM in general, because he isn’t. He did manage to retool his 2010 Cup winner into a team that was basically the best in the NHL over a 3-year stretch from 2013-2015, so maybe he can still do that here. And at least some of his bad moves were only made necessary because the Loonie went to shit, and took the NHL’s salary cap with it. But there isn’t much exciting talent in the pipeline, and the best players on his NHL squad are declining much too quickly for anyone’s liking. And he put himself in this position.

So don’t go telling me that Stan Bowman is the best GM in Chicago over the last three years. He literally took a Stanley Cup Champion and stripped it down to what is currently barely better than a last place team, all while thinking, as far as we can tell, that he was making his team better. He just about slammed his team’s championship window shut while trying to keep it open. At least his last name still carries some weight in the NHL.

Everything Else

Game #43 – When the Going Gets Tough and the Stomach Acids Flow – Hawks 1, Wild 2

By John Pullega 2476 0

Box Score

Hockey Stats

Natural Stat Trick

Sometimes hockey is stupid. The Hawks did everything you’re supposed to do, and they still come out of it with no points and no spot in the playoffs as of now. To the bullets.

– Let’s not bury the lede. Brent Seabrook slotted back in and scored the Hawks’s only goal. With all the grace of a Weeble, Seabrook wobbled but didn’t fall down as he crashed on a hard Kempný one timer from the point off a pass from Schmaltz. It was the perfect kind of goal given the broadcasting booth we had tonight. Feather had probably the best idea of the night though: Just scratch everyone for the next game and enjoy the 18 goals we’ll get afterward. While it was nice to see Seabrook pot a goal, outside of that, he was much of the same old. Yes, his foot block sprung Kane for a Wingels crossbar, but outside that, Seabrook was as plodding as ever.

– The Hawks got goalied tonight. When you have a 67 CF% share at 5v5, you normally expect to win by three, four, five goals. Fuck, the Hawks had and 80% share in the first, and only managed one goal. So credit where it’s due. Devan “My Face Is Way Too Fucking Small for My Head” Dubnyk shut down the Hawks from start to finish with 34 saves, and absolutely earned the two points the Wild walk away with.

– Like the terrifying Russian nesting doll he is, Beef ‘n’ Cheddar Bruce Boudreau’s ability to take all of the fun out of hockey is multilayered. He managed to keep his team, which had the puck for less than one-third of the game, afloat though the Hawks’s barrages. He put the Wild into a fucking 90s trap in the third period. I wish I could analyze what a stupid dickhead he is further, but his whole “How can I make hockey even worse than people think it is” schtick is too infuriating for words. Fuck him and his refusal to have a neck.

– If we’re going to dress seven D-men, which we shouldn’t because it’s such an inefficient and stupid idea, we cannot have Connor Murphy be the odd man out. We’ve got Seabrook at 14 minutes, Kempný at 12, and Murphy at 7. In what fucking world does it make sense to have Murphy and Kempný play less than Seabrook? I know yesterday was against the Senators, but of all the times to get Cubist with the blue line, why does Q have to do it against a divisional opponent on the ass-end of a back to back in a game in which the Hawks need two points? Again, Murphy has been BY FAR the best defenseman the Hawks have dressed in the last two months. What’s the logic here, if not THE NARRATIVE?

– With Wiener Anxiety heading to Arizona, Q decided to double shift Kane. He played almost 26 minutes tonight, more than any other Blackhawk. As usual, his line dominated, but this time, they failed to put anything away. So all we really take away from this is that Kane’s outrageous TOI led to Minnesota’s game winner after Kane took an offensive zone penalty. Great.

– Let’s try to be positive now. I’ve never been happier to be wrong about something than I am about Jordan Oesterle. He led all Hawks D-men in TOI with 25:52, and for the second straight game led the first PP unit instead of Keith. He also managed to clear a puck from the crease and prevent a goal. I’m always going to look at him a bit side-eyed for no other reason than he couldn’t hack it with the Oilers, but in the time he’s been here, he’s looked a lot better than expected.

– When your backup goaltender only gives up two goals, there’s no excuse to not win. The first goal wasn’t really Forsberg’s fault. I guess if you want to lay blame on Forsberg, you can go the Brian Boucher route and say that Forsberg overcommitted, but when a shot takes such a wild bounce off Wingels’s stick, I’m not going to place too much blame on the goalie.

But that second goal was one Forsberg probably wants back. I get that Suter has a heavy shot, but with no screen and a good view, it’s not a goal you can just shrug off. Still, if you’re only giving up two goals against the worst possession team in the NHL, you should expect a win.

– Probably not one to write home about for Duncan Keith, but it wasn’t for lack of trying. This was one of Keith’s junkyard dog, try-to-do-everything games, and with that often comes the kinds of egregious turnovers he committed at a few points in the game. WHAT DEY NEED TA DO IS DEY NEED TA SCRATCH KIEF ON FRIDEE SO HE KEN SCORE HIMSELF A BIG GOAL ON SUNDAY, MY FRENTS.

– I could go on and on about Milbury being the worst Fred Flintstone impersonator on Earth, but honestly, outside of the beginning of the second period, I managed to not listen to a goddamn thing that overgrown, overpaid pile of rocks and garbage said. Fuck him.

Sometimes hockey is stupid. That’s really all tonight was. Look forward to Duclair and pray to whichever god you like that Seabrook isn’t in the lineup Friday (he will be).

Beer du Jour: Zombie Dust and Two Hearted

Line of the Night: “I know how hard it is to do what he does.” – Mike Milbury, flat out lying about how he can relate to what a good player Patrick Kane is.

Everything Else

Game #43 – Wild vs. Hawks Preview , Toenail Trimming – Labour Issues In The Toy Department

By Matt McClure 2302 0

 vs 

Game Time: 7:00PM CST
TV/Radio: NBCSN National, WGN-AM 720
Strictly Leakage: Hockey Wilderness

After going above and beyond the call of duty in dispatching with the dreadful Senators last night in Kanata, the Hawks turn right back around for a RIVALRY NIGHT game against the divisional opponent Minnesota Wild, who are currently tied with the Hawks, but have played more games and have fewer regulation wins. What a time to be barely alive.

Everything Else

The Leader Is Good. The Leader Is Great. We Surrender Our Will as of This Date

By John Pullega 2541 0

It finally happened. On January 9, in the Year of our Lord 2018, Alternate Captain Brent Seabrook was a healthy scratch for the first time in any of our memories.

This is a weird moment for me and all of us at FFUD. We tend to spend the time that we aren’t pissing in the wind screaming at the ghosts and spirits of what could have been, if only the organ-I-zation had put any sort of forethought into the decisions they’ve made. Losing guys like Stephen Johns, Phil Danault, and Our Special Boy Teuvo were partially the result of the Hawks handing out massive contracts to THE CORE. And while we always sort of understood the Toews and Kane contracts, Seabrook’s has always been a running joke that got less and less funny the worse he got.

So in light of this, I want to talk about a couple of different things that have happened regarding Seabrook recently. It’s important to remember that Seabrook is neither dead, retired, nor likely to sit for long. But this is still a watershed moment worthy of some reflection, if only for now.

Part of the confusion in affect over this healthy scratch is that Brent Seabrook, for a vast majority of his career, has been an integral part of the Blackhawks’s success. He’s played more games for the Blackhawks than any current Blackhawk and ranks fifth overall in games played for the Hawks. He ranks fourth among all Blackhawks for Defensive Point Shares—behind Keith, Doug Wilson, and Bob Murray—and ninth among all active players.

And of course, he’s contributed some of the most memorable moments in Blackhawks playoff history: Whether it was the game winner in the third OT against Nashville in 2015, the series-clinching goal that sent the Wings off to the Eastern Conference in 2013, or yes, his Dr. Katz therapy session with Toews in the box in that same Wings series, Brent Seabrook’s fingerprints are all over the success the Hawks have had over the last decade. It’s really important to note these things because Seabrook has been a leader and has been an important part of the Blackhawks success.

So even though we’ve been calling for it forever, now that it’s here, there’s a sort of hollow feeling. Not quite the end of an era, but something similar, sort of like managing to swerve out of a head-on collision and realizing that one day, everything’s going to end. Or if you’d rather take a less Robert Smithian view of it, it’s like managing to sneak away from a first date for a moment to rip a gigantic fart in the peace of a private bathroom, avoiding the horror of what could have been.

The scratch was our Moby Dick, and now that we have it, all that’s left is a terrifying relief.

That said, this healthy scratch probably came much, much later than it needed to. Recall that the Blackhawks are currently out of a wild card spot and without their Vezina-worthy goaltender. While it would be both folly and tempting to blame all of this on Seabrook, especially following the 8-2 drubbing of the comically bad Senators, he sure didn’t help matters.

We all knew what we were getting with Seabrook coming into the season: an aging physical defenseman whose possession numbers were on the decline and who needed to be babysat. And the possession numbers this year flesh this out:

Aside from Kane, Heart Man, and Wide Dick, most Blackhawks are noticeably better when Seabrook is off the ice (5v5). It’s especially troubling when Seabrook is starting more than 56% of the time in the offensive zone. In addition, Seabrook is on pace to score the fewest points he’s ever scored, has a nearly 3:1 giveaway/takeaway ratio, and trails only Duncan Keith—who has been paired primarily with Franson, Oesterle, and, would you believe it, Brent Seabrook—for most high-danger shot attempts allowed at all strengths.

By all metrics and eye tests, Brent Seabrook is currently a bad hockey player. What made it worse was twofold: his personal affront of a contract and the constant drumbeat about his leadership as parsed out by the organ-I-zation.

The Seabrook contract was the bigger brother of the Bickell contract. Coming off the euphoria of a third Cup in six years and one of Seabrook’s best offensive playoff performances of his storied playoff career, the brain trust offered him money they couldn’t afford over years they didn’t have, hamstringing any effort to add useful role players and forcing the Hawks to settle for retreads (Oduya, Ladd, Campbell) and rapscallions (Fleischmann, Wiese, Tootoo) to fill out the roster. But like the Bickell contract, you simply cannot blame Seabrook for taking what he was offered. But that contract, along with his pedigree, was for too long the unspoken justification for trotting him out there despite his inability to do even the things he’s always been good at, passing and shooting.

Watching Seabrook huff and puff this team toward the bottom of the division was confusing at best and outright infuriating at worst. But none of it was quite as infuriating as THE NARRATIVE about Seabrook’s leadership on Sunday.

Whether you’ve read this program after buying it outside the UC, when it was under the SBNATION banner, or have only recently come onboard, you’re familiar with one constant: our outright rejection of and revulsion over THE NARRATIVE. THE NARRATIVE is the way the organization covers for its own miscalculations, hypocrisies, and panic attacks. Whether it’s Crawford’s weak glove hand, Franson as a top-pairing D-man, or literally any excuse concocted to explain the dire mismanagement of Teuvo Teravainen, there’s no problem the Hawks’s brass can’t explain away with THE NARRATIVE. And on Sunday, THE NARRATIVE was focused on Seabrook’s leadership.

Just before giving Anton Forsberg a deserved what-for for giving up a weak five-hole goal, Eddie Olczyk proclaimed that he “loved that play from Brent Seabrook” after Seabrook tapped Forsberg on the pads as each team regrouped. He went on to discuss the importance of Seabrook’s leadership to the team and alluded to his legendary Toews calming during the 2013 Western Conference Semis.

And it all rang hollow, because it’s Grade-A, organ-I-zational horse shit.

In a game in which Connor Murphy—the best D-man the Hawks have dressed over the past two months—was a healthy scratch because, as Mark Lazerus later reported, “It was just his turn,” it was hard to swallow Eddie dedicating any time at all to what amounts to Seabrook being a nice guy, let alone a highlight reel of the pad tap. I have no doubt that Forsberg appreciated the comfort, but of all things for an analyst to analyze, why is it the nebulous concept of the leadership of a player who we all know is a leader by virtue of the “A” on his sweater?

Why is there no discussion of Forsling’s absurd over-commitment on Cammalleri along the far boards, leaving Darnell Nurse all the time and space in the world to crash a high-danger zone?

I don’t want to rag on Eddie too much. I genuinely enjoy listening to him most of the time; he’s infinitely more interesting to listen to than Konroyd; and as we all know and admire, he’s doing coverage for the team while fighting through constant chemo. But I’d rather get his thoughts on what Forsling was thinking, not a story about Seabrook’s leadership. Eddie always likes to laugh about bringing his crayons out, and at one of the best times to do it, he cuts to Brent Seabrook tapping Forsberg’s pads. With the McDonough Marketing Machine, there are no such things as coincidences, so what’s the angle?

Seabrook has a full no-movement clause for the next four years, so it’s likely not trade pillow fluffing. Seabrook is one of the longest tenured Blackhawks around, and anyone who’s watched even the bare minimum of Hawks hockey is familiar with the stories of Seabrook’s leadership (e.g., Toews Talk 2013), so it’s not informational. And when you couple this with the tongue lacquering Forsling got earlier in the year coming off his concussion, the lack of analysis in favor of a leadership workshop looks less like an oversight and more like a distraction.

So are we talking about his leadership as though that’s where his sole value lies? If so, there’s a term for guys who can lead hockey players but can’t keep up with the pace of the game: “Coach.” And no one—save maybe the guy who’s having his strip club lunch-buffet tab paid by Jon Cooper after the game—is going to the UC to watch a guy coach.

There’s always going to be an appreciation for what Seabrook used to be. But having Eddie ogle a full replay of a pad tap instead of going back and analyzing the play that led to it reeks of THE NARRATIVE, a way to justify slotting a bad player on an even worse contract over a young and talented defenseman who’s been the primary reason Seabrook has even been presentable over the past two months.

If you want to be optimistic, maybe you look at Sunday as Eddie softening the blow and setting up an explanation for why he was scratched on Tuesday. And knowing the McDonough Marketing Machine and Eddie’s close proximity to the people that make the sausage, that wouldn’t shock me. But at least THE NARRATIVE there would square with Seabrook’s performance and save me the trouble of gluing my hair back on my head after tearing it out watching Connor Murphy sit in favor of Seabrook.

There isn’t one sober Blackhawks fan alive who doesn’t remember when Seabrook gave Toews The Talk during Game 5 of the Western Conference Semis in 2013. It will rightly go down in Blackhawks lore as a prime example of Brent Seabrook’s leadership. When the brass gave Seabrook the “A,” it was much, much less surprising than the Animal Style contract they tossed him just a week or two later. By all player accounts, it’s Seabrook more than anyone else who lifts the team up in the locker room. And when the whole Sharp kerfuffle flared up in 2015, it was Seabrook, rather than Toews or anyone else, who handled the press and commanded the locker room. There’s no doubt that Seabrook is a leader, but this year, his leadership has not been able to mask his odious performance on the ice. Anybody who’s anybody in Hawks fandom doesn’t need to be told about Seabrook’s leadership, and anyone who doesn’t know is going to learn long before the organ-I-zation shoehorns mention of it into whichever marketing piece it drums up next to keep asses in seats.

We’ve seen it in the past, we’ve seen it in the playoffs, and we saw it when he took his first healthy scratch we can remember with dignity and understanding. Brent Seabrook is a leader, but that doesn’t make up for what he’s done this year.

In a perfect world, Seabrook and Rutta will swap in and out as their stamina dictates going forward, and we’ll get our Keith–Oesterle, Kempný–Murphy, Forsling–Rutta/Seabrook, or some variation thereof. For now, we’ll revel in a true show of leadership, as Brent Seabrook takes a long, much needed healthy scratch for the first time in too long.

The contract doesn’t go away with his, nor does the specter of Seabrook slotting in for Murphy and Kempný in the near future. But for once, all of us who have shouted from the mountains for a Seabrook scratch can rest easy and say, “Maybe we weren’t as crazy as we thought,” while we try to come up with ways the Hawks can trade for Erik Karlsson.

Everything Else

Game #42 Runnin’ a Little Bit Hot Tonight – Hawks 8, Senators 2

By Rose Rankin 2996 0

Box Score

Natural Stat Trick

Corsica

Sometimes you want something so badly that you become fixated on it, you turn the image or idea over and over in your mind, and eventually you build it up into a magnificence that’s totally out of proportion. And when you finally get it, the reality can’t possibly live up to your imagined ideal, and the chasm between desire and result is painfully clear. I am happy to report this situation did NOT happen tonight with my defensive pairing fantasy-turned-reality of Kempny-Murphy while Seabrook sat in the press box. Let’s get right to it:

– I was, dare I say, elated to hear that Seabrook was getting sat tonight. No, I don’t hate him—in fact I have an inordinate amount of affection for anyone on the Cup-winning teams (I know, I know, I’ve bashed him all season but you’ve got to believe me). So honestly, I felt pangs of guilt over how happy I was. And I still feel some now over how happy I am with the defensive play tonight generally. Yes, Rutta got de-pantsed by Duchene in the first, yes, he and Foreskin were scrambling like meth-addled gerbils in the second which led to the first Senators goal, but we knew they were going to pull shit like that. What I care about was that Michal Kempny and CONNOR MURPHY! had, respectively, a 71 and 69 CF% (NICE). Two of the Hawks’ goals included assists by both defensemen on the ice at the time. This was a defense I could live with, even if I’m still confused by Forsling-Rutta (whatever). As my esteemed colleague Adam mentioned earlier today on Twitter, we can make fun of Seabrook and still think good things about him. I’ll be thinking of warm fuzzy memories while he enjoys nachos from the comfort of the press box (fingers crossed).

– Wtf where has this power play been? The Hawks scored three—count ’em three—power play goals tonight, which I’m pretty sure ties their pp goals for the season. Schmaltz had two of them, which more than made up for his rather dismal possession numbers (25 CF%?? Hey, you get a pass tonight, pal!). All the way around, they had better traffic in front of the net, and while the Senators’ PK definitely blows (28th in the league), the Hawks power play actually blows worse (29th). So if this is what it takes to get some creativity and confidence on the man advantage, so be it. Better they’re the punching bag than us.

– I know there’s been a lot of chatter about the Hawks somehow waving a magic salary cap wand and getting Erik Karlsson at the trade deadline, and the merits of this idea are best saved for another time and place, but I can’t get over his dejection at taking a needless interference penalty in the second which led to Rutta’s goal. Karlsson finished the night with a 63.9 CF% so it wasn’t all doom and gloom—he just pulled a great Denis Lemieux.

– Speaking of Ottawa defensemen, I truly forgot that Dion Phaneuf was still in the league. I found he’s still a useless oaf, and I hope he goes away soon.

– Patrick Kane had five points tonight, and apparently that’s the first time he’s done that, which seems odd. It would have been better if Schmaltz had gotten a hat trick instead of Kane getting the 8th goal in the third period, but isn’t this a nice thing to be complaining about?

– Anton Forsberg was solid again tonight. He finished with a .926 SV%, and I couldn’t even hold the first goal against him. The Senators had about 35 chances while Forsling and Rutta do what they do in the defensive zone, and Mark Stone eventually capitalized after about 17 of those 35 chances. Forsberg made key saves when he needed to and he looked confident and well-positioned. Keep it going, guy.

You couldn’t ask for more than a DLR when going through a rapid sequence of games right before the bye week. It’s not only that points are important, which they most certainly are, but the Hawks also need to take advantage on nights like this and beat shitty opponents (check), and some momentum through this week when they’re facing the Jets in a few days definitely helps too. Also, you can’t tell me it’s a coincidence that on the night when the entire team sees that membership in the Circle of Trust actually has limits, they explode like a pimple and score eight goals. Yes, the Senators suck, but the Hawks have played plenty of shitty teams and not had a DLR.

On that note, I’d just like to point out that the last DLR this season was game #1, when I was doing the wrap, and now at the halfway point of the season, as I’m writing the wrap, they do it again. Clearly it’s me, so you’re all welcome.

Beer of the night: Little Sumpin’ Sumpin’ by Lagunitas