Everything Else

Well Pilgrim, Not Until You Eat The Peanuts Outta My… – FFUD’s ’17-’18 Player Reviews – Victor Ejdsell or I Am Not A Gun

By John Pullega 2024 0

In running himself out of town by means of his performance and (allegedly) his mouth, Ryan Hartman turned into a late first-round pick and the towering Victor Ejdsell. Ejdsell impressed in his NHL debut, lining up between Saad and Kane to the tune of a 51+ CF% and three shots on goal. Then he sort of disappeared in his last five, primarily between DeBrincat and Sikura. Let’s see what we can pick out in a mere six games from our newest Éric Dazé–sized center.

Victor Ejdsell

6 GP, 0 Goals, 1 Assist, 1 Point, -1, 0 PIM

43.3 CF% (Evens), -2.7 CF% Rel (Evens), 37.88 SCF% (5v5), 35.96 xGF% (5v5), -8.66 xGF% Rel (5v5)

 60% oZ Start (Evens)

What We Said: Ejdsell comes with plus-hands . . . The big concern is whether or not he can skate enough to make any of it matter . . . The Hawks were after Ejdsell when he chose the Predators, and generally the European players they’ve been hot on tend to work out at least ok . . .

What We Got: Overall, we got a small feel for what Ejdsell might be able to provide in a sheltered role. His first two games were his best, as he managed four shots and his lone assist. After that, he disappeared completely for his next three, losing 66% of his faceoffs or more, and managing zero shots on goal. He took three shots in the very last game, then got sent down to Rockford for their playoff run.

Perhaps the most encouraging thing about Ejdsell’s cup of coffee was that he didn’t spend too much time playing the role of Annette Frontpresence. He’s got soft hands and good vision according to most scouting reports, and in his debut, he spent much more time in the high slot than in front of the goaltender. That’s a good thing, because by all accounts, Ejdsell’s play style is much smaller and more skilled than his frame suggests. There’s still plenty of time for Quenneville et al. to fuck that up and neuter him by cementing him in the crease because he happens to be large, but in his mini-audition, they seemed willing to let Ejdsell be Ejdsell and not Artem Anisimov.

There isn’t a ton more we can glean from his six games in terms of performance. While all of his advanced stats are downright awful, it’s over six mostly meaningless games, during which he played most of his time with DeBrincat and Sikura. More encouraging is how he’s playing in Rockford. He’s got two goals and two assists in three games, including a triple-overtime, series-sweep-clinching goal against the Wolves. Jon Fromi had some positive things to say about him:

Wasn’t bad in his own end and showed he can finish a scoring play in Game 3 [against the Wolves] . . . I haven’t seen any problems as far as him keeping up with the pace the Hogs like to play. He hasn’t looked out of place at all coming from the larger ice.

Fromi also said that the Ice Hogs are letting him play in transition, as he’s been at the front of some of the rushes. He’s also played a bit on the point during the power play with Dahlstrom, which might be encouraging.

Where We Go From Here: Given the Hawks’s makeup at center—with Toews and Schmaltz in the top two, Tommy Wingels all but guaranteed to come back, Artem Anisimov not yet traded, and our David Kampf in the background—it doesn’t seem like there’s a lot of wiggle room for Ejdsell next year. But with his size and the supposed skill he’s got in his hands, there could be a spot for him somewhere in the bottom six—maybe next to Duclair and Sikura—assuming Saad, Kane, DeBrincat, and Vinnie round out the top six, as they should.

Realistically, he’ll find a home in the bottom six, making us wonder whether he’s actually two smaller hockey players underneath a trench coat sneaking into a movie they shouldn’t be at.

But you didn’t come to the Victor Ejdsell review for rational, stats-based analysis, and neither did I.

What you came for is a complete skullfuck of unbelievable and nearly impossible trades involving Ejdsell, and I’m here to give it to you.

Because the Blackhawks are running out of time with this core’s window, they’re going to make two moves to pry it back open, and they involve a ton of risk. But with the core aging and three consecutive disappointing years behind them, it’s time for Bowman to ride the snake.

The first move can come in one of three flavors, each one requiring more GENIOUS BRAIN neurons than the last to comprehend, to fill the big hole in the blue line. The second, of course, is a no-brainer. Everything that follows assumes the cap goes up to at least $80 million and that the Hawks either trade or LTIR Hossa before the draft.

1a. Package both first-round picks, Ejdsell, and Schmaltz for Calgary’s Dougie Hamilton. Throw in Rutta, and Anisimov and his 11 power play goals if you can get him to waive his NMC. According to Kent Wilson over at The Athletic, “The Flames will be looking to recoup some draft picks and find an impact right winger to solidify the attack up front. The team may be tempted to put Hamilton on the auction block to fill one or both of those needs, but that would likely turn out to be a mistake.”

Schmaltz’s 52 points and 21 goals last year might not be the high-level scoring Calgary would need to justify the trade, especially since Giordano–Hamilton is one of the best pairings in the league. Then again, Wilson pointed out that the Flames seemed to have trust issues with Dougie, using him both less than T.J. Brodie on average and rarely in higher-leverage defensive situations (penalty kill, overtime, as the sole defender on the power play). And this is a team that signed Jaromir Jagr as an offensive solution then acted surprised when he stopped giving a shit, and thought signing Michael Stone was a solution for defensive depth, so Flames GM Brad Treliving might be a moron.

2a. Sign John Tavares at $12 million. Our fearless leader, King of All Media, and overall maven already laid it out for you. If that went through, you’d have

DeBrincat–Tavares–Kane

Saad–Toews–Hinostroza

Duclair–Kampf–Sikura

Highmore/Jurco–Anisimov/Wingels–Hayden

Keith–Hamilton

Gustafsson–Murphy

Seabrook–Jokiharju

1b. Package both first-round picks, Ejdsell, Hinostroza, and Schmaltz for Erik Karlsson, and even that might not be enough for what Ottawa would need for the best D-man in the game (Bobby Ryan would probably be involved, making this impossible for the cap). But let’s assume Pierre Dorion is a special kind of moron, and Ryan isn’t involved.

2b. Sign John Tavares at $12 million. That leaves you

DeBrincat–Tavares–Kane

Saad–Toews–Duclair

Jurco–Kampf–Sikura

Highmore–Anisimov–Hayden

Keith–Karlsson

Gustafsson–Murphy

Seabrook–Jokiharju

1c. Package their #8 pick, Artem Anisimov, Victor Ejdsell, and Vinnie Hinostroza for Justin Faulk. The scuttlebutt is that Carolina is losing patience with with Faulk, and given Canes owner Tom Dundon’s questionable ability to properly value and compensate the people who work for him, he might be griftable. Dundon, a man with next to no professional experience in hockey, wants to play Mark Cuban, so maybe you sell him on Anisimov’s VETERAN PRESENCE and 20-goal season as a center, Vinnie’s offensive potential, and Ejdsell’s size and skillset. The problem here is Anisimov’s no-move clause doesn’t turn into a limited no-trade clause until after the draft. Maybe you get him to waive it by selling him on playing with Andrei Svechnikov, I don’t know.

2c. Sign John Tavares at $12 million. That gives you

DeBrincat–Tavares–Kane

Saad–Toews–Duclair

Jurco–Schmaltz–Sikura

Highmore–Kampf–Hayden

Keith–Faulk

Gustafsson–Murphy

Seabrook–Jokiharju

Ejdsell may not be a gun, but maybe he can be one of the bullets that get the Hawks the top-pairing D-man they need, based on his size alone and the coinflip that is NHL GM dipshittery. Though it’s 99.9% certain none of this will happen, especially since DeBrincat would probably need to go for most of these trades to even be plausible, a boy can dream.

Everything Else

Well Pilgrim, Not Until You Eat The Peanuts Outta My…: FFUD’s Player Reviews – Alex DeBrincat or Perhaps The Most Special of All the Special Boys

By Adam Hess 1666 0

I will never forget the probably irrational joy I felt when Alex DeBrincat and his 100+ point production from the OHL fell to the the Blackhawks at No. 39 in 2016. I was practically screaming at my television for Stan to not join his colleagues in their stupidity in passing up a top-10 talent and arguably the most natural scorer in that draft that wasn’t named Auston Matthews or Patrick Laine just because you could fit in him your pocket. Luckily Stan pulled the trigger, and after just one extra season of development in the O, Top Cat made the jump to the NHL and lit the damn world on fire.

Alex DeBrincat

82 Games, 28 Goals, 24 Assists, 52 Points, +6, 6 PIM

53.76 CF%, 1.85 CF%rel, 48.36 xGF%, -1.62 xGF%rel, 57.19 Zone Start Ratio

And it almost wasn’t that way. Every rumor and news tidbit seemed to indicate that Joel Quenneville wanted our precious boy to start the year in the AHL, but with each passing preseason game in which he looked like one of the best six forwards on the roster (and that number might be generous) it became more evident that not having him on the NHL roster would be a huge mistake.

So when his plan of not having him on the team didn’t work out, Q decided to go an alternate route and just put him in the most assinine roles conceivable. Move a natural left wing to the right? Check. Give him fourth line minutes with Tommy Fuckin’ Wingels and Lance Fuckin’ Bouma? Check. Combine the two? FUCKIN’ CHECK!

Now, it wasn’t always bad for Top Cat in linemate department. In reality, the two centers he spent the most 5v5 time with on the roster were Toews and Schmaltz, and that’s how it should be. The problem is, that sort of thing doesn’t immediately come to mind because again, that’s how it should be, and no one notices when things are going as expected. But they do notice spending 167 minutes opposite Ryan Hartman, or 142 minutes flanking just Artem Anisimov. That’s just 50 less minutes than he spent with Schmaltz.

But this isn’t meant to be a bitch-at-Q-about-usage post, because I already did that with Gustav Forsling. Let’s talk about the good that came from DeBrincat’s season.

He made the squad as a 19 year old, and ended up leading the team in goals with 28, beating out Garbage Dick by one. He tied with Schmaltz and Toews for second on the team in points at 52. Was 8th on the team in CF% and 6th among forwards. And in those times that he did play with subpar linemates, he still managed to play well and at times carry those players. He also is feisty as shit, and doesn’t let his size scare him away from getting scrappy when necessary, which isn’t exactly a big deal but it’s certainly not a bad thing.

There’s not much more to say about Top Cat that hasn’t already been said earlier this year. We’ve heaped praise upon the boy, and for good reason. It’s pretty obvious that Top Cat, along with Schmaltz and a few others, is the future of this team up front, and with that being the case I feel confident in saying this team’s forward group is in good hands moving forward. Top Cap has 35-goal potential if he can just get put and left on a line, and I think it’d make a lot of sense for him to play with Toews and Saad consistently next year.

Everything Else

Well Pilgrim, Not Until You Eat The Peanuts Outta My…-FFUD’s Player Reviews: Nick Schmaltz or Finally A Light

By Sam Fels 1930 0

It sounds strange, as bad as the Hawks were at times. The thing was, they were rarely boring. And almost all of that came down to their young forwards who burst onto the scene. And perhaps leading that charge was Nick Schmaltz, who was finally left alone to play center (at least most of the season) and proved that’s where he should have been all along. That doesn’t mean there wasn’t incessant bitching about his habit of not shooting enough, but clearly the Hawks have a definite #2 NHL center on their hands, perhaps their best one since before Patrick Sharp decided he was too good or too handsome or too both to play there anymore.

Nick Schmaltz

78 games, 21 goals, 31 assists, 52 points, +1, 18 PIM

50.3 CF%, -2.54 CF% rel, 48.8 xGF%, -1.23 xGF% rel, 64.2 ZSR (zone-start ratio)

Certainly, the entertainment factor with Schmaltz is high. And it’s easy to overestimate his contributions by a touch because he’s so easy to notice. The Hawks might not have had a player faster with the puck consistently than Schmaltz, and his vision opened up a lot of things for his wingers. Stalberg may have been faster but wasn’t nearly as shifty, and neither was Sharp in his heyday. Whether you’re in the arena or just watching at home you know when Schmaltz is on the puck, and it’s easy to think he’s dominating games that way, or at least more is happening than actually is.

Again, you have to look at Schmaltz’s numbers closely because mostly they were accumulated with Patrick Kane, which helps. It also skews how you view his possession numbers. Schmaltz, or at least the Hawks when Schmaltz was out there, outscored what his possession and chance-numbers suggested they should. The thing is this tends to happen with Kane on the ice for years, as he’s never been a great possession player but is so lethal that he’ll usually cash in or set up teammates to do so more than the percentages suggest. Whether Schmaltz can carry this out away from Kane, should this come up at some point next season, remains a question.

There were obviously flaws to Schmaltz’s game. He’s not very big, which led to him getting beaten down low in his own zone a lot and thus getting pinned in there or shifts at a time. This was clearly Q’s main concern, either starting him in the offensive zone as much as possible or discarding him to wing at times as well. As we know, Q doesn’t really like d-men or centers that don’t do everything, and Schmaltz struggles with the own-zone portion of the game. But in an ideal world, the Hawks would have a #1 and #3 centers who could take most of that responsibility, leaving Schmaltz to start a majority of times in the offensive zone. It’s certainly a model other teams have used. So Schmaltz’s future hinges a bit on any Toews revival and/or future acquisitions and whether or not EggShell is anything.

A lot was made of Schmaltz’s pass-happy ways, though he still managed 21 goals which you’d take from a #2 center pretty much every season. The number that jumps out at you is that he shot 17.8% to get there. Given the amount of chances he was getting for himself (0.51 ixGF/60) and what he ended up scoring (0.91 iGF/60) he is going to have to get more chances to get to 20+ goals again because it’s not likely he’s gong to maintain a near 18% shooting-percentage. His rookie year saw one of half that, so let’s split the difference and say he can settle in to a 12-13% shooter.

Outlook: It would be peachy keen if Schmaltz could ascend to a true #1 center and give Toews something of a break. And the list of centers the past decade or so who put up 50+ point seasons at 21 is encouraging (here’s a look if you need). Still, it’s hard to look at Schmaltz’s size and skillset and think he won’t always need to be at least a little sheltered in terms of shifts and opposition. But being Robin to someone else’s Batman is hardly a bad role to be, and one a team needs to be successful. Yes, it counts on getting anything more from Toews, though that’s hardly an impossibility. Schmaltz will be in a contract year next season, so if he’s going to pop for ace numbers, now would be the time. But he can definitely count himself a piece.

Everything Else

Game #82 – Our Long National Nightmare is Over – Hawks 1, Jets 4

By Adam Hess 2409 0

Box Score

Hockey Stats

Natural Stat Trick

It’s over. It’s finally over. The Blackhawks season has come to an end, with a significantly less exciting outcome than it started with. Let us all store vow to never speak of this season again (until this coming week when you will read several eulogy-esque posts on this site). Gonna take a slightly different approach with this wrap, because at this point there is nothing more to take from the game itself. So if you don’t mind, I’m gonna give you a quick rundown of how the game went, and then touch base on a few of my takeaways and favorite moments from the season:

– First things first, I want to tip my cap to the way these two teams paid tribute to horrible tragedy of the Humboldt Broncos hockey team. From the vigil in the picture above, to the wearing of the word “Broncos” on every player’s jersey, and the donations made by the teams and league, they did a wonderful job of paying respect to the tragedy and offering their support. Good on them.

– The first period was pretty boring. Both teams had a few chances but couldn’t capitalize, but Jets controlled most of the play and didn’t seem particularly inspired to do anything drastic on offense. The Blackhawks, meanwhile, didn’t seem to have much interest in doing anything at all. Dustin Byfuglien opened the scoring with a power play bomb in the first, Winnipeg scored again in the second period when Kyle Connor beat Jeff GL Ass on a breakaway, and that was basically game over. The Jets added two more in that frame, and Seabrook saved face for the Hawks a bit by notching a goal about midway through the middle frame, but that was all. Nothing of major note happened after.

– Let’s address the elephant in the room – the biggest takeaway from this season is that Corey Crawford is really freakin’ good, and beyond a shadow of any doubt, the most important player on this Blackhawks team. We all knew this team’s biggest issue was that they didn’t have adequate goaltending before it became a talking point, and all of the Blackhawks himming and hawing about it NOT being the goaltending only proved that point further. They were pointing a big arrow to the secret treasure with that said “DEFINITELY DON’T LOOK HERE.” There’s no reason to think he won’t be able to come back at 100% next year, but we as fans just have to hope that he does, because if he doesn’t, next year might even be worse than this one.

– The next most obvious takeaway from this year is that the Hawks need help on the blueline. This is a conversation that’s been had countless times already. No obvious hope is coming in this regard, unless a miracle happens and the Hawks win the Dahlin sweepstakes. Hope and pray for that one as well.

– My favorite moment of this season was Alex DeBrincat’s first hat trick, with his second and third Hat Tricks coming at number 2 and 3. I was thrilled when the Hawks landed him at number 39 a few years ago, and I can’t wait to see more of him moving forward. He is the future of this time, along with Schamltz, up front.

– Thank you to all you guys who read this website and these wraps. I think I can speak for everyone when I say that we truly appreciate all of you and all of your support. We quite literally can’t do this without you guys to listen, read, share, etc. Here’s hoping we can produce some good content for you this summer, and that there will be some big additions to talk about (lookin’ at you, Rasmus Dahlin and John Tavares).

Everything Else

Game #75 – I’ll probably die anonymous – Hawks 2, Canucks 5

By Adam Hess 2060 0

Box Score

Hockey Stats

Natural Stat Trick

This one was a real shit show, and that all started this afternoon before the game even started. I have some questions. Let’s get right to the bullets:

– So let’s get to the one that I think is the most glaring: what the heck was this lineup? Please don’t get me wrong, I know that with Toews out with an “upper body injury” aka getting his offseason started a bit early, there aren’t a lot of really good options available. But why aren’t you just top-loading then and putting Top Cat and Kane on the wings of Schmaltz? With Toews and Duclair out, you really only have 4 players worthy of top-six minutes – these three and Saad. You’re out of the playoffs already, and the league is trending toward the top-heavy lineups already. There’s no value in “depth” or “balance” in your lines at this point. Even though it’s just the Canucks, let your two young guns – who are the future of your forward group, by the way – take on the top competition with your best player and see what they can do.

– My next question: Why are we still trying this Oesterle thing? His contract is fine, of course, but that’s only because he had done jack and shit before getting here. He’s been actively bad all year. I guess I sorta see the goal in pairing him with Murphy, who has been good, and hoping it evens out, but I’m just not sure what Oesterle is giving you that Dahlstrom’t or Forsling didn’t, and those two are obviously going to be more integral to the future success of this team than Jordan Fuckin’ Oesterle. Nothing to play for, so why not just claim Keith is hurt, use an “emergency” recall for Forlsing, and use him in that role instead and see what happens? Yes I know Keith probably wouldn’t play along. Put some legos in front of his locker or something.

– Thirdly: what’s your best guess on career NHL games played for JF Berube after this season? Because teams often get desperate for backups, I’ll go optimistic and say he probably gets another two or so years to see if he can be that. Which will be hilarious for whatever team that is (it’ll be this one) because he is very clearly NOT that. I’m setting the over under for him at 55.5. What do you got?

– I’m out of questions, but I have some more thoughts. Sam put on Twitter tonight that sitting Toews is the best outcome for the pro-tank people, like myself. That’s pretty obvious. The only way it could get more tank-y would be to sit Keith as I said before, or maybe Kane, but I doubt either wants to play along, and I certainly am not about to give Kane any longer of an offseason than he deserves (don’t forget, we’re three years since his last act of menace, so we’re on pace for another one). But I’m not sure how much actual value is in that. Even if you get to 4th-to-last place, you’re only improving your draft odds by about 1.5%. Maybe giving Keith the rest is worth it, if he wants it, but I think even with him in the lineup this team is bad enough to slip, and teams like Detroit, Monteal, and Ottawa will probably fuck up by going on a run to close the year out. So basically what I’m after here is, leave Toews out, see if Keith wants to sit, and start praying to whichever diety you follow that the ping pong balls go our way.

– To close out on a high note, I want to wish my sincere congratulations and well wishes to Eddie Olczyk on him kicking cancer’s ass. Having a few family members who have done it, as well as a friend and co-worker here in Rose, it makes me happy as hell to hear every time someone tells cancer to get fucked. I am very happy for Edzo and hope for only good health for him in the future. And on a selfish level, the less Steve Konroyd we have to deal with, the better. Fuck Cancer.

Everything Else

Game #72 – The Blarney Stone Brings A Tear To Me Eye – Hawks 3, Sabres 5

By John Pullega 1863 0

Box Score

Corsica

Natural Stat Trick

Kent O’Brockman once said that on St. Patrick’s Day, “Everyone is a little bit Irish, except of course for the gays and the Italians,” which is why you’re stuck with me for the wrap of this horseshit game. Let’s get to it and keep it brief, as there’s drinking to be done. To the bullets.

– When it mattered most, the Hawks dropped all of the corned beef they’d been cooking. After a ho-hum first, the Hawks looked more like the Hawks we’ve paid for in the past than the Hawks we’re currently paying for, posting a nice 69+ CF%. But the wheels came off in the third, as the Hawks got pantsed in possession by the (now second) worst team in the league, getting pasted for a 37+ CF% at evens. I assume that like many of us, they were looking forward to doing anything but subjecting themselves to Blackhawks hockey, and it showed.

– On his special day, our Large Irish Son had what could best be described as a mixed bag of a game. Murphy found himself on the third pairing with Oesterle and looked spry early, leading the Hawks with three shots on goal in the first. He also ended the game with a 65+ CF% and looked to be more aggressive on the rush, crashing and joining the play deep more often than I’ve ever seen.

But he also found himself on the ice for all three of Buffalo’s 5v5 goals. He was partially to blame for the Sabres’s first goal, as he overcommitted on Reinhart on the far boards. This, coupled with Patrick Sharp getting caught staring at whatever it is washed up wingers playing to a three-fourths-full stadium in Buffalo look at, gave Reinhart a gaping lane through the Royal Road to Ristolainen, who swept a pass past Jordan Oesterle and onto Pouliot’s backhand for a messy goal. The other two came off tips from Nicholas “Don’t Call Me Jean” Baptiste, so it’s hard to blame him for that. Still, we’ll have to watch going forward to see what it is Murphy might be. I will die on the “he’s the best D-man the Hawks have” hill, but there are some questions that I have regarding his awareness and positioning. Certainly not giving up hope, but there are questions.

– Highmore–Schmaltz–Vinnie was world beating for the first two periods. Granted, it’s against Buffalo, but the speed and vision they showed was encouraging. Each ended well above the team rate in possession and showed a decent amount of chemistry together. They all need to add some meat to their respective asses if they want to compete against better teams in terms of possession, but with Vinnie’s speed and shot, Schmaltz’s hands and vision, and a sort of snarl that Highmore has shown over the last two games, this is a line to watch going forward, assuming they stay together.

– Brandon Saad’s woes continued today. He shanked a few opportunities right in front of the net and was trounced in possession, posting a 42+ CF% for the game (-12.10 CF% Rel). Again, he’s not one I’m willing to give up on, but it’s frustrating to watch him struggle. It doesn’t help that his linemates couldn’t be bothered to give a shit for the first half of the game, but it’s not an excuse.

– I was four beers in by the end of the first period, but even I couldn’t believe that Alex DeBrincat was playing with Stonehand Tommy and Stonefoot Artie for this one. Alex DeBrincat isn’t a fucking third liner. I know that he hasn’t had much offensive luck over the last 10 or 12 games, but how does putting him on the ice with a guy who can’t move and a guy who can’t stick handle solve that? I guess it’s hard to figure out where to put him if you’re committed to 20–19–88, but with talent like his, it seems like you’d want to nurture it, not dampen it.

– I seem to get every J-F Berube start these days, and I always say some variation of, “He looked good for a guy who allowed more goals than good goalies allow.” I’ll say it again about today. The first goal was more on Murphy and Sharp than him, the second was on a fluke bounce on the PK, and the last two were off high-traffic tips. I’m not sure what else he can do, and I’m curious to see whether he’s the guy backing up Crow next year. I’d want to look at more tape, but he just seems more in control when he’s out there than Forsberg.

– Toews scored his 20th goal today, which was off a big rebound from Every Fraternity Chapter’s President Chad Johnson. He’s been on a nice roll offensively lately, which is nice to see as the season winds down.

– Foley had all the energy and faith of a man who had just gotten pick pocketed at his church on Good Friday, which makes for interesting listening. Sort of like a high school football broadcast by a student whose crush rejected him for homecoming. But watching him froth over a picture of a Sabres’s fourth liner punching some other hockey player I can’t be bothered to look up in the face while stereotypical Irish music played in the background during a stoppage was the most hilarious thing about this game, hands down.

Just 10 more of these things to go. Happy St. Patrick’s Day to you all today, Happy St. Joseph’s Day to the rest of you for tomorrow. The end is mercifully near.

Beer du Jour: Guinness, because Italians don’t know how to make beer.

Line of the Night: “Let’s see how green his tongue is at about midnight tonight!” –Foley on Adam Burish

“Ehhhh. . .” –Konroyd’s response

Everything Else

Let’s Find Some Hope: Nick Schmaltz

By Sam Fels 1814 0

I know, it isn’t like me to try and find the positives in anything. It’s not what you’re used to after 10 years of being here, if you’ve been here that long (and God help you if you have). But we haven’t been in this position before, so it’s healthy to try and figure out why we’re going to even bother next year (and some of you won’t, and in some ways I envy you).

The Hawks are going to have some decisions to make this summer, which should make for a really interesting one. But before they make those choices, they have to figure out what they have here first. So at the forwards, the Hawks have to decide what Jonathan Toews is and will be. The general consensus is that he’s done as a #1 center, given his scoring problems the past couple years. I’m not so sure about that, given what the underlying numbers say.

But let’s just give into that for the sake of this. Say Jonathan Toews is a #2 center now. That means the Hawks have to find another #1 center, because you can’t really win without one. None of the recent Cup winners have gone without an ace, and it’s hard to even identify teams that got to a Final. Last year’s Preds, because Johansen was hurt, but he got them most of the way there when he played like one. The Rangers of ’14? The Devils of ’12? And really, that’s about it.

The Hawks don’t have one in the system, a product of drafting 25 or above for so long. The only hope is one Nick Schmaltz, who has had a better year mostly playing center than I thought he would. He’s going to finish with 50-60 points at just 21, and at center which isn’t easy to learn. But what’s the precedent for centers who do that? Luckily, thanks to HockeyReference.com, we can find out.

So here’s the list of centers who had 50-60 points in their age 21 season the past 12 seasons: Ryan Strome, Adam Henrique, Derek Stepan, Bo Horvat, Sasha Barkov, Nathan MacKinnon, Jack Eichel, Ryan Nugent-Hopkins, Brayden Point, Alex Galchenyuk, Ryan Getzlaf, Logan Couture, Pierre-Marc Bouchard.

For the most part, that’s an encouraging list. There are some names that give you pause of course. Ryan Strome is one, though he’s been on a wing for years now. Bouchard never did much after concussion problems. But other than that, the minimum here is a very solid #2 center.

Does that mean Schmaltz could be the #1 one day? Hard to say. Couture has never had to do it but easily could have. Getzlaf is but that wasn’t his rookie year. Same goes for Eichel and MacKinnon. So that might not be the road for Nick At Nite.

We can safely say that Schmaltz can be a #2 center on a good team. But that doesn’t solve your #1 center problem. Can the Hawks live again with like, three #2 centers? It’s hard to think of anyone who has done it. That’s the most likely trajectory for Schmaltz.

It’s funny, for so long the problem the Hawks had was no #2 center behind Toews when Sharp decided he didn’t want to play center anymore. And now it appears they might have too many.

Everything Else

Game #66 How Does it Feel to Be One of the Beautiful People? – Hawks 3, Ducks 6

By Rose Rankin 2429 0

Box Score

Natural Stat Trick

Corsica

As is their way, the Hawks ricocheted from being interesting yesterday to incompetent today, managing to dig themselves into a hole from which light could not escape, much less their shitty offensive capabilities. To the bullets:

–Putrid defense put the Hawks down early. In the first Keith got beat on Rakell’s goal, and Jordan Oesterle went full-on Jordan Oesterle and just watched mesmerized as Corey Perry spin-o-rama’d around him for the second goal. On both Pettersson’s and Silfverberg’s goals in the second, I wished Forsberg would have had them, but he was being screened on the former and generally hung out to dry on both. Of course, Forsberg took the heat for all this and got pulled for Berube mid-way through the second. I can’t fault Q for that decision, but at the same time I can’t fault Forsberg for all those goals (winner: most well-worn line this season).

–The Hawks actually did show some life after the goalie switch. They ended the second with a 61.2 CF% and were beating the Ducks in shots thanks to sustained pressure late in the period. Tomas Jurco made himself useful with a couple shots and a redirect of Connor Murphy’s shot for their first goal. So it was nice that the Hawks felt nervous enough to actually try skating after Forsberg got pulled, but we should note that it didn’t come after another eventful moment in the second…

–…And that moment was the Toews-Kesler fight. Now, admittedly I was genuinely laughing out loud as this took place. Normally during theses GRIT HEART FART demonstrations I roll my eyes and complain, but the lack of physicality and the total uselessness of this “battle” was truly hilarious. It did absolutely nothing in terms of FIRING UP the Hawks—in fact they gave up two more goals while Toews was in the box, basically putting the game out of reach before it even got to halfway through the second. Amusing as it was, this fight encapsulated why fighting is dumb and pointless: it doesn’t make guys play better and it lands someone in the box for five minutes. Well done.

–Schmaltz’s first goal in the third was a good case study in persistence. It was also kind of a softie for Gibson, but whatever, I’m going to take what I can get. I’m hoping that as this LONG offseason proceeds, he works on his strength so that he can out-muscle backcheckers just like that all the time. Also, the play of that line (Top Cat-Schmaltz-Hinostroza) on the third goal was lovely, and gives me hope for the future after said offseason.

Whatta weekend, right? It’s been quite a time in California, but now the Hawks are coming home so they can fuck up at the UC for the next week. Now that we know what this season is, and we know what will not be happening come April and May, we can just innocently wonder what each game will bring, because as this road trip showed, you really never know with these assholes. Onward and upward.

Beer de jour (accurate for once as this game was de jour not de nuit): Furious by Surly Brewing (because no two adjectives could describe me better)

 

Everything Else

Game #65 – Iron from ice – Hawks 5, Kings 3

By Adam Hess 2104 0

Box Score

Natural Stat Trick

In the interest of full disclosure, I missed like 50 minutes of this game. I forgot it was a day game and I had work. However, I really saw all I needed to see, based on early reports from the game not much happened. But those last 12-ish minutes that I did see were very good. Let’s dig in, breaking down the four goals I witnessed after turning it on at 3-1:

– I cannot tell you how much joy I got out of turning on the television to see Drew Doughty being led to the penalty box only to throw a fucking temper tantrum because his little shitstained diaper hadn’t been properly changed. He slammed his helmet and whined at the referee, earning a second penalty and giving the Hawks 4 minutes of penalty time. They didn’t do much with the first half of it, but were able to keep at it and eventually Wide Dick slammed home a one timer off a rebound to make it 3-2.

– The next goal was a direct result, in my opinion, of Nick Schamltz being really fucking good at hockey. He got a long, cross ice pass floated to him near chest height, which he expertly knocked down with control. Then, being alone in the zone, he slowed up and evaluated the ice with his SuperMan vision (no I am not being hyperbolic) while letting his teammates get up ice, before making a good pass for Dahlstrom to hit a one timer toward the net. That resulted in a really terrible clear attempt by something called Derek Forbort, which fell right to Vinnie Hinnie and he squeaked it through Jonathan Quick’s five hole. Yeah it took a little help, but none of it is possible if Schmaltz doesn’t knock down that tough pass, then have the presence of mind to wait for his teammates and giving Dahlstrom a nice pass to hit toward the net. 3-3.

– I don’t know what got into the power play tonight, but I kid you not they scored two power play goals in one period in this game. I am not entirely sure if it was on purpose, but Kane and Toews found themselves flipped in the formation, with Toews on the right board in one-timer position while Kane was weak side. Kane got the puck at the half board and fucked around with it as he wont to do on the power play, and must admit I loudly groaned while watching him fiddle with it with seemingly no plan. But then, miraculously, he actually waited a passing lane open, and fed Toews with a nice little cross ice pass. Toews settled it for a beat before firing past Quick low blocker side. 4-3.

– The fifth goal was an empty netter that was hilarious because #1 Kane absolutely did not have to put it home. He was all alone on a “breakaway” with just 3 seconds left, but he put it in the net anyway with 2.9 seconds remaining which is just great. But the Kings then wet their diapers even more, as they are known for, with Anze Kopitar, Drew Doughty, and Jonathan Quick (who wasn’t even on the ice!) slamming their sticks in such embarrassing fashion you could actually hear audible gasps from the Staples Center crowd on the television. 5-3.

– Just to circle back, the Hawks whole comeback was the result of known fuckstick and giant pissbaby Drew Doughty shitting his diaper in the penalty box because he wasn’t happy he was sent to timeout. That is extremely my shit. I am still in favor of the quasi-tank, but beating the Kings like this, and having it be a result of Doughty being a baby, is so satisfying.

– Another takeaway from this game – that didn’t look like a team that has quit on it’s coach. After a truly shitty second period when they gave up 3 goals, they could’ve taken their ball and gone home. They battled. Don’t count Q out of that job just yet.

Everything Else

Game #63 – Hawks vs. Blue Jackets Preview, Tub Scouring – What Jail Is Like

By Matt McClure 1796 0

 at 

Game Time: 6:00PM CST
TV/Radio: NBC Sports Chicago, WGN-AM 720
Maurice Clarett’s Tattoo Shop: The Cannon

As this Wannstedt-esque death march of a season trudges onward, the Hawks turn right around from last night’s win against the Sharks and head to Columbus tonight, where Torts and the Jackets hang on to the last wild card spot in the east by the slimmest of margins.