Everything Else

Marty – Our Savior Who Art In Heaven

By 1518

That’s not just a stupid title. During our first year as a blog, intrepid reader Eric Rabbers made us t-shirts of Martin Havlat as Jesus and printed up prayer cards to him, that I believe we read out loud before Game 1 against Vancouver in 2009. That’s how deep the psychosis went.

If you’re a newish fan, and it’s no problem if you are, you might look at Havlat’s three years in Chicago and wonder why older fans like us still go weak in the knees whenever we see his name (or a picture of his face, because… well, I mean, c’mon). It’s hard to explain just how deep the malaise had set in when Marty arrived.

Everything Else

You Used To Be Silver: Hawks at Stars Preview/Band Camp

By 1443

 vs. 

RECORDS: Hawks 31-17-5   Stars 21-21-10

PUCK DROP: 7pm Central

TV: WGN locally, NHL-N for you elsewhere

RIDE ‘EM IN: Defending Big D

PROJECTED LINEUPS

TEAM ADJUSTED CORSI %: Hawks – 50.3 (16th)  Stars – 49.4 (2oth)

TEAM ADJUSTED xGF%: Hawks – 47.8 (24th)  Stars – 49.3 (18th)

POWER PLAY %: Hawks – 18.1 (17th)  Stars – 18.1 (18th)

PENALTY KILL %: Hawks – 75.9 (28th)  Stars – 73.4 (Dead Ass Last)

The Hawks get the chance to back up their streak-snapping win on Thursday by playing another expressway of a defensive team, the Dallas Stars. It would behoove them to get it, because next week’s slate of Wild-Jets-Oilers before the bye week is looking a bit nasty at the moment, considering either the standing of those teams or their previous record against the Hawks the past couple seasons or both.

Everything Else

Now Here Is Nowhere: Hawks 1 – Sharks 3

By 1502

Box Score

Natural Stat Trick

The sad thing is, however infinitesimal, that there was a good portion of this game that the Hawks played with some gusto, verve, pepper, whatever word you want to use there. But it might be a while before we see that again. Tonight’s loss leaves the Hawks six points behind the Zack Wyldes, having played three games more. Unless they take both the games in the next month in St. Paul in the reg, they’re going to finish second. There simply just isn’t much to play for the rest of the season, which is going to lead to some awfully snooz-y hockey.

Anyway, for tonight, both teams came out of the break rested and wanting to push the pace. The mini-problem was that neither teams is really capable of playing at the pace they attempted tonight, at least not for any long stretch. Thankfully they didn’t stop, which made for some wonderful entertainment. But there were a lot of missed passes, turnovers, scrambles at both lines, which did open things up for chances, at least for the first 40 minutes.

In the end, the Hawks were undone by two bits of bad luck and two bits of Hjalmarsson and Keith getting caught just a tad out. They also may have fallen victim to going a bit conservative in the 3rd period, only managing one shot in the last seven minutes or so. But I won’t hate on them for thinking at least a point at a Western Contender’s garden (in the shade) is a nice enough haul. Two shots wide that kick right back out in front, with Hammer on the first and Keith on the second not really having time to go from trying to front the shot to tying up whoever was in front (and on the second it caught up in Crow’s pads anyway). That’ll happen.

Everything Else

Mission Report

By 1530

Much like baseball, the NHL has installed its All-Star break after the middle of the season. You get why, as you wouldn’t schedule the All-Star game on Super Bowl weekend or during the NFL playoffs (though the NHL All-Star game probably makes for a better pregame show to The Big Tilt than the actual pregame show. I guess the Canadiens wouldn’t want to give up that slot thought). Much like baseball doesn’t want to put it’s All-Star game anywhere near the 4th of July. So whatever. It’s a nice marker either way.

So where are the Hawks? Well, in some ways this is the earliest the Hawks have been entrenched in their spot, aside from when they didn’t lose for half a season in 2013. The Hawks only sit four points behind the Wild, but have played three games more, and if the Wild win even one of those they’re going to be awfully hard to catch with how things work. Even if they fell off a bit, Dubnyk is going to get them into overtime just enough to prevent complete collapse. On the other side, the Predators are nine points behind, and even with their two games in hand that’s a massive gap. They’re not getting caught.

You know what’s weird? In the Q era, the Hawks have only finished second in the division once. And that was Q’s first year, when it was a conference system and that really meant being fourth in the conference. Since then it’s been 1st, 3rd, 4th, 1st, 3rd, 3rd, and 3rd last year. Just a note for all of you there.

Everything Else

Everybody’s Working For The Weekend: Jets at Hawks Preview/We’re Not The Bulls Celebration

By 1628

 vs. 

RECORDS: Jets  22-25-4   Hawks 30-15-5

PUCK DROP: 7:30pm Central

TV: CSN

FOR WE’VE GOT NOWHERE TO BE: Arctic Ice Hockey

PROJECTED LINEUPS

ADJUSTED TEAM CORSI %: Jets – 49.2 (20th)  Hawks – 50.0 (16th)

ADJUSTED TEAM xGF%: Jets – 50.6 (14th)  Hawks – 47.5 (25th)

POWER PLAY %: Jets – 17.7 (17th)  Hawks – 17.6 (18th)

PENALTY KILL %: Jets – 76.8 (27th)  Hawks – 75.8 (28th)

Interesting position the Hawks find themselves in here. Having won three of four, and with the break right on the heels of this one tonight, you wouldn’t be surprised if they played this one with sunglasses on and Bermuda shorts underneath their pants (I assume this is how Panarin has been playing the last month). On the other, the Hawks are coming off a bad loss on Tuesday, losing in regulation when leading after 40 for the first time since Daley was in charge or some shit (no, not Trevor, moron). Backing that up with an in-division loss would certainly put a small pall (see what I did there?) over the vacation time. But then again, this is still a game in January. So you tell us.

Everything Else

All Lost In The Trade Market

By 1860

We’re getting into silly season now. We’re 34 days away from the deadline, and with the Hawks having their “bye week” in the middle of it soon, we know the chatter is going to heat up. There have been names already being tossed around, except almost all of them would be a complete waste of time. So let’s toss out a few players that aren’t going to do anything for anyone before we get to ones that could actually help.

Jarome Iginla – Old, slow, not good anymore, and would be too heartbreaking if it didn’t work.

Patrick Sharp – Will be out for the season if he encounters a stiff breeze, also stationary, and still small matter that most of the dressing room still hates his guts.

Shane Doan – Seriously?

All right, now that’s over, we can get on to something a little more substantial.

Everything Else

I Don’t Even Know What This Is Supposed To Be: Canucks at Hawks Preview/Juice Cleanse

By 1422

 vs. 

RECORDS: Canucks 22-19-6   Hawks 29-14-5

PUCK DROP: 6:30pm

TV: WGN down here, SportsNet up there for Hilljack Hockey

CRYING INTO THEIR VAPORIZER: Nucks Misconduct, Hockey Dipshit

PROJECTED LINEUPS

ADJUSTED TEAM CORSI %: Canucks – 47.5 (24th)  Hawks – 50.0 (16th)

ADJUSTED TEAM xGF%: Canucks – 46.4 (28th)  Hawks – 47.5 (26th)

POWER PLAY %: Canucks – 13.2 (29th)  Hawks – 18.1 (16th)

PENALTY KILL %: Canucks – 79.7 (23rd)  Hawks – 75.6 (28th)

The Hawks will entertain the Canucks tonight, a half-hour later than normal for a Sunday because it features on SportsNet’s hilariously weird “Hometown Hockey.” For the uninitiated, every Sunday Rogers sends Tara Slone–who must’ve run over someone’s cat/child to be punished in such a way–out to some Canadian outpost/backwater/truck stop/hobo circle jerk where she gets stared at by a bunch of glassy-eyed, slack-jawed locals who are only slightly intimidated by all the blinking lights of the camera. There they talk about how much they love hockey, shocking for a Canadian city I know, while the children have to wear their gear for four hours and wave to the camera when told, which turns out to be a real task for them, because y’know, CANADIAN. Ron MacLean joins the fun to interview some doddering old codger who barely knows where he is because he spent 10 years toiling for the fucking Golden Seals or something and getting beaten about the head. But he’s from whatever ice-fishing hut they’re broadcasting from, so he has talk about how much they love hockey in this particular section of frozen hell. It’s really something.

Meanwhile, George Stroumboulopoulos kicks it at home with his awesome socks and thanks his lucky stars he doesn’t have to put up with any of this shit anymore.

Anyway…

Everything Else

Upon This Rock

By 1496

This week has seen Jonathan Toews be the target of more vitriol and criticism from Blackhawks fans than the rest of his entire career combined. Some of it is most certainly justified. Toews is on pace for less than 15 goals this season, his possession numbers have cratered in a lot of ways, and he just has not been noticeable on the ice most of the time. As we pointed out in the podcast, the coup de grace was doing his angry-Toews act in the press on Friday after the Hawks were picking parts of the Caps’ boots out of their chests for hours, and then getting completely worked over by Mikko Koivu on Sunday in response. This is just not something we’ve seen from Toews very much, if at all, in his now 10 years in the NHL.

It has been this blog’s contention, or maybe just this lone derelict’s, that Duncan Keith’s game has slowed so far this season as well, no matter how much Eddie Olczyk yells at me and no matter how much he piles up secondary assists.

Maybe it’s time we wonder if these things are at least partially linked.

Everything Else

All Your Friends Are Moving To Denver: Hawks at Avs Preview/Metal Spin Class

By 1337

 vs. 

RECORDS: Hawks 27-14-5  Avalanche 13-27-1

PUCK DROP: 8pm

TV: CSN, NBCSN for those outside the 606

CHILLING AT THE INVENTING ROOM: Mile High Hockey

PROJECTED LINEUPS

ADJUSTED TEAM CORSI %: Hawks – 50.0 (15th)  Avs – 44.8 (Dead Ass Last)

ADJUSTED TEAM xGF%: Hawks – 47.3 (26th)  Avs – 41.5 (Dead Ass Last)

POWER PLAY %: Hawks – 18.6 (15th)  Avs – 13.0 (29th, because the Wings are Dead Ass Last)

PENALTY KILL %: Hawks – 75.6 (28th)  Avs – 78.5 (24th)

If this recent stretch of Hawks hockey, be it this past weekend or the past couple weeks or the last month and a half, would be something you would define as “middling,” or “disappointing,” there simply can’t be a better cure than a visit to Denver for a contest with the Avs. Though the Hawks lost the last tilt to this bombed out structure, that was the game before the Christmas break when the Hawks were clearly had the motor running. Do that again, and you’ll know the Hawks simply could care less right now.

Everything Else

These Aren’t The Droids You’re Looking For: Wild at Hawks Preview/Bonfire

By 1328

 vs. 

RECORDS: Wild 27-9-5  Hawks 27-13-5

PUCK DROP: 6pm

TV: NBCSN

ANIMALS STRIKING CURIOUS POSES: Hockey Wilderness, Gone Puck Wild

PROJECTED LINEUPS

ADJUSTED TEAM CORSI %: Wild – 49.8 (18th)  Hawks – 49.8 (17th)

ADJUSTED TEAM xGF%: Wild – 54.2 (2nd)  Hawks – 47.2 (26th)

POWER PLAY %: Wild – 19.5 (13th)  Hawks – 18.8 (14th)

PENALTY KILL %: Wild – 84.6 (6th)  Hawks – 76.3 (28th)

Repeat this to yourself, because it’s important: There are no big games in January.

We’re sure the Wild are using this as some sort of exam. The Hawks have been doing this contender thing long enough to know that it doesn’t matter. However, after getting their ass rubbed in the moonshine by the Capitals, the Hawks probably don’t want that to snowball into anything worrisome. So they won’t be completely disinterested tonight, or at least you’d hope not.