Faxes from Uncle Dale

Author: Sam Fels

  • Friday Musical Interlude: Shirley

    Friday Musical Interlude: Shirley

    Though some of us are at least mildly concerned, and some are in a full-blown panic about the Hawks, it’s Friday, it’s the first warm weekend of the year (at least as far as I can remember), and that all should be cause to have a little fun.

    If you’re like me — and judging by the fact that you’re reading a hockey blog and most of you have demonstrated a similar musical taste and attitude, you most certainly are — then you were also probably a pretty fucking awkward teenager. Then again, everyone’s an awkward teenager.

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  • Admitting You Have A Problem Is The First Step: Blues 3 – Hawks 3 (Blues Win Beer Pong)

    Admitting You Have A Problem Is The First Step: Blues 3 – Hawks 3 (Blues Win Beer Pong)

    The Hawks make it easy these days. Whatever happens, it all seems to be on a recurring theme. So at least I don’t have to come up with something, which we know I suck at. And they are to wit:

    -Once again, a 3rd period lead goes poof. Thankfully, the Blues were happy to give it back. This time, it wasn’t a systematic failure , but an individual mistake leading to Cracknell’s equalizer (was it Bolland or Rozsival who whiffed on the shot at the point? Live I thought it was Bolland, and the replays don’t pick up that early.) But the thing is, in the 3rd period, it’s always SOMETHING. Be it an individual mistake, a bad goal, a bad bounce, systematic breakdown….whatever. Enough of it has happened that it certainly can’t be filed under “Shit happens.”

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  • Deadline Passes, Stan Stands Pat With Record-Setting Team

    I haven’t looked at my Twitter today since about 2, and I don’t think I’m going to. I’m sure I know what it’s filled with. And right now I don’t want to read a bunch of stuff about how Stan fucked us all out of another Cup because he didn’t discover that Wayne Gretzky actually was able to reverse in age yesterday and is now 26 again and just dying to play for the Hawks. Or that he wasn’t able to pry Vinny Lecavalier away from the Lightning for a 5th round pick and get permission from Bettman to tear up his contract at season’s end with absolutely no penalty because the NHL loves the Hawks that much.

    In the end, we knew what this day would consist of. The Hawks made the one move they had available to them on Monday. Though I’m not enamored with Michal Handzus, he is kind of what they were looking for. If you want to get upset about something, go apeshit about when he’s playing wing tomorrow and Bolland is still centering for Kane and doing a horrible job of it but having it masked by Kane channeling Denis Savard ’85.

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  • Happy Opening Day – Here’s The First Ivy Drip…And It’s Free For All

    With the baseball season beginning today, along with a new venture, celebrate by having a look at it on the house. If you like what you see, then go ahead and sign up and get the rest of them all year. If you don’t….I’ll just have to try harder.

    4:1 (Season Preview)

  • Hawks at Wings 3rd Period Thread

    And there’s nothing short a’ dying
    That’s half as lonesome as the sound
    Of the sleeping city sidewalk
    And Sunday morning coming down.

  • Hawks at Wings 2nd Period Thread

    Then I fumbled in my closet through my clothes
    And found my cleanest dirty shirt.
    Then I washed my face and combed my hair
    And stumbled down the stairs to meet the day.

  • Hawks at Wings 1st Period Thread

    Well, I woke up Sunday morning
    With no way to hold my head that didn’t hurt.
    And the beer I had for breakfast wasn’t bad,
    So I had one more for dessert. Well, I woke up Sunday morning
    With no way to hold my head that didn’t hurt.
    And the beer I had for breakfast wasn’t bad,
    So I had one more for dessert.

  • Play In Your Own Sandbox: Hawks at Scum Preview/Pregame Thread/Spring Fertility Festival

    vs.

    FACEOFF: 11:30am Central

    TV/RADIO: NBC, WGN 720

    NOT YET KILLED BY ROBOCOP: Winging It In Motown

    If the Hawks are going to snap out of this midseason malaise (if indeed that’s what it is) in the next week or so, they’re going to have to do it against the Central Division. Seven of the next eight games — all in the next two weeks, mind — come against the Central residents (and it’s a whole lot of Predators, but we’ll worry about that on Monday). It kicks off with a return brunch engagement against the somewhat resurgent Red Wings. It’s as resurgent as an elderly squad can be, like that half-pep your dad gets in his step for a couple minutes after a big shit. Or is that just mine?

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  • Last Night’s Page 8 – Stan’s All Lost In The Trade Market

  • Daddy’s In The Doldrums: Ducks 2 – Hawks 1

    Daddy’s In The Doldrums: Ducks 2 – Hawks 1

    After seeing it in person tonight, I’m more convinced than I was before that the Hawks are going through nothing more than a midseason malaise, combined with some injuries to key players. While the Hawks can pay lip service to saying that they thought this was an important game because they hadn’t beaten the Ducks, upon evidence on the ice I’m not buying it.

    Tonight, it wasn’t so much anything the Ducks did. The Hawks for the first 40 were missing passes by feet instead of inches, they were bobbling whatever passes did actually land on tape, and just generally looked like they’d been at The Houndstooth a little too late last night. It seemed like the Ducks were even more conservative in this one than they had been in the previous two games. Usually, it was only one Duck forward in on the forecheck, which the the Hawks made harder than they had to too often.

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