Everything Else

 vs. 

RECORDS: Avs 20-47-3   Hawks 46-20-5

PUCK DROP: 6pm Central

TV: WGN Locally, NHL Network outside the walls

THEY ACTUALLY WATCH THIS: Mile High Hockey

PROJECTED LINEUPS

ADJUSTED TEAM CORSI%: Avs – 45.8 (29th)  Hawks – 50.7 (13th)

ADJUSTED TEAM xGF%: Avs – 45.3 (29th)  Hawks – 49.0 (18th)

POWER PLAY %: Avs – 12.9 (Dead Ass Last)  Hawks – 18.8 (16th)

PENALTY KILL %: Avs – 77.8 (25th)  Hawks – 78.0 (24th)

Sometimes a team comes into the United Center and they need no introduction. Tonight is not one of those nights. Then again, the Avs have been singularly bad this season, and maybe that makes them unique. They have 43 points. 43. The Hawks had 43 points on December 15th. That was three months ago.

Everything Else

I suppose the only way last night’s offsides debacle really matters is if the Wild win the division by a single point, and that somehow matters in the playoffs whether the Hawks lose in the first round to an opponent whom they wouldn’t have played or if they lose to the Wild in Game 7 in Minnesota (because that’s oh so likely to a Boudreau team). But I’ve hated the challenge system in every sport since they instituted it, and it’s important to see why.

Both MLB and the NHL went to the “challenge” system to essentially mimic the NFL’s system. But that in itself is ridiculous, because the NFL system was basically adopted so the NFL could abdicate responsibility. It was either terrified of slowing down the game or that it couldn’t make the right decisions, or at least to restrict when they would go to video review. Sure, no one wanted a game where there was a delay of 30 seconds while a video review took place.

But that wouldn’t happen. What takes longer? A video review official taking one look at a controversial play and deciding it needs to be reviewed, or a team employee doing it, radioing down to the coach, who throws a flag, who then has to explain to the ref why he’s hurling laundry onto the field (and from now on they should throw a dildo), only for the ref to then go and review the thing with the aforementioned replay official?

Everything Else

We’re getting into silly season now. We’re 34 days away from the deadline, and with the Hawks having their “bye week” in the middle of it soon, we know the chatter is going to heat up. There have been names already being tossed around, except almost all of them would be a complete waste of time. So let’s toss out a few players that aren’t going to do anything for anyone before we get to ones that could actually help.

Jarome Iginla – Old, slow, not good anymore, and would be too heartbreaking if it didn’t work.

Patrick Sharp – Will be out for the season if he encounters a stiff breeze, also stationary, and still small matter that most of the dressing room still hates his guts.

Shane Doan – Seriously?

All right, now that’s over, we can get on to something a little more substantial.

Everything Else

 vs. 

RECORDS: Hawks 27-14-5  Avalanche 13-27-1

PUCK DROP: 8pm

TV: CSN, NBCSN for those outside the 606

CHILLING AT THE INVENTING ROOM: Mile High Hockey

PROJECTED LINEUPS

ADJUSTED TEAM CORSI %: Hawks – 50.0 (15th)  Avs – 44.8 (Dead Ass Last)

ADJUSTED TEAM xGF%: Hawks – 47.3 (26th)  Avs – 41.5 (Dead Ass Last)

POWER PLAY %: Hawks – 18.6 (15th)  Avs – 13.0 (29th, because the Wings are Dead Ass Last)

PENALTY KILL %: Hawks – 75.6 (28th)  Avs – 78.5 (24th)

If this recent stretch of Hawks hockey, be it this past weekend or the past couple weeks or the last month and a half, would be something you would define as “middling,” or “disappointing,” there simply can’t be a better cure than a visit to Denver for a contest with the Avs. Though the Hawks lost the last tilt to this bombed out structure, that was the game before the Christmas break when the Hawks were clearly had the motor running. Do that again, and you’ll know the Hawks simply could care less right now.

Everything Else

I don’t know where Anthrax Jones (@AnthraxJones) crawled out of. I rue the day I found out. But he’s a part of the scene now. So let’s all swallow hard and get through this together…

Half-decent start for the Avs so far, and it’s not even because of great goaltending or some other goof. What’s impressed you so far?

It’s hard to explain exactly how it comes across, but they seem like a more mature, level-headed team. Two games into the season, they had twice faced an early 2-0 deficit in each game, which would’ve meant Dead And Buried last season. They didn’t panic, they didn’t play like their hair was on fire, they chipped away and eventually won both games (against Dallas and at Pittsburgh, so not exactly schlub teams). It makes me wonder if, despite Patrick Roy’s mostly even-tempered demeanor during his tenure, they were a team playing tight because they were afraid of or intimidated by their coach.

Everything Else

evil empire at simpsons avalanche rocket house

Game Time: 8:00PM Central
TV/Radio: CSN, WGN-AM 720
Summit County Mountain Retreats: Mile High Hockey

Now that the league and all of its fans are done treating a 6’8″, 265 lb., 33 year old man with a mechanical engineering degree that he can’t wait to remind everyone he has and has punched people in the face for a living for going on the last decade (and has conservatively made $4.25 million dollars doing so) as they would a Make-A-Wish Foundation child, the games that matter can now resume. But because of more fun with the NHL rule book the Hawks are now without Jonathan Toews tonight because he had the good fortune to be sick and not have to show up for the farce in Nashville.

Everything Else

250px-Ozymandias vs. Avalanche Snowman Christmas

PUCK DROP: 7pm Central

TV/RADIO: CSN, WGN Radio

COMIN DOWN THE MOUNTAIN: Mile High Hockey, Anthrax Jones Twitter Feed (if you’re really into punishing yourself)

Avalanche Stats

Avalanche War On Ice

The Hawks will close out 2015 at altitude, taking on an Avalanche team that’s probably been their biggest headache over the past few years. Strangely, the Hawks have done much better in Denver than they have at home against the Avs. They won two of three there last year, and the one they lost was the last game of the year where half the team didn’t play and the Hawks certainly didn’t think it mattered in any way. Contrast that to losing both home games against the Avs last year, the first one this year, and two of three the year before that.

Everything Else

Avalanche Snowman Christmas vs evil empire

Game Time: 7:30PM
TV/Radio: CSN, NBCSN, WGN-AM 720
Rocky Mountain Oysters: Mile High Hockey

While the Hawks’ schedule at first blush would indicate an opportunity to get right over the next couple weeks while facing teams behind them in the standings, things don’t always end up playing out that way. Especially against the Avalanche who visit tonight, who continually have given the Hawks problems over the better part of this decade.

Everything Else

avalanches vs oldschool

Game Time: 7:30PM Central
TV/Radio: CSN, TVA, SN1, SNO, WGN-AM 720
The Banquet Beer: Mile High Hockey

Amid the blowing snow propelled by wind carrying sub-zero chills, the Hawks will host the Colorado Avalanche for the first time this season on the west side. And though the Avs have predictably and hilariously fallen squarely on their stupid asses this season as basically everyone thought they would, they have still always been problematic for the Hawks even when they have sucked to (mile) high heaven.

Everything Else

AltLogo at avalanches

Game Time: 8:30PM CDT
TV/Radio: CSN, WGN-AM 720
The Blasting Room: Mile High Hockey

For being in the same division for the first time ever, it sure feels like the Blackhawks have played the Avs 45 times already this season. But in reality, tonight will close out the first ever divisional season series between these two clubs, with the sixth and final meeting coming tonight at the Pop Can in downtown Denver.