Box Score
Event Summary
Natural Stat Trick
Another night, another winnable game, another set of pants pissed. The problems remain the same, and for the most part, so do the outcomes. On paper a 2-1-1 road trip spanning a break is ultimately fine, but this team doesn’t have the luxury of fine anymore.
vs. 
RECORDS: Hawks 24-20-7 Flames 25-18-8
PUCK DROP: 9pm
TV: NBCSN Chicago here, Sportsnet up there
FRIENDS OF CAL AND GARY: Flamesnation.ca
It can get exhausting living this way. After most losses you pronounce the season over, only to build yourself back up by the next game to say the turnaround has to start RIGHT NOW, even though that’s what you said before the last game. The constant push and pull gets deeper every time, and no matter which side you’re on that day THIS TIME YOU MEAN IT. So it is with that in mind that we say once again, the Hawks have to start their attack run RIGHT NOW, especially considering the next four points on offer are four points they could deny a direct competitor in the Calgary Flames. They’re going to have to climb over teams, and they get to face Calgary, Anaheim, and Minnesota in the next two weeks. Biff it, and then we’ll know it’s all over but the shouting and we can get on to dreams of Yoan Moncada and a Kyle Schwarber renaissance.
And this might be a good time to catch the Flames, who appear to be a real mess. On the same night the Hawks were letting out a beer belch in Vancouver, the Flames were spectacularly blowing a 4-2 lead to the Lightning at home to lose 7-4. That probably doesn’t do it justice, either. Mike Smith gave up four goals in eight 3rd period minutes to blow that lead, and it was a singular meltdown. You probably saw the GIF of him breaking his stick against the post before being pulled, though we’ll excuse you if you can’t tell it apart from the dozens of other GIFs of Mike Smith going apeshit toddler on his posts and stick.
It broke a hot streak for Smith, who before that had only surrendered 14 goals in his last eight starts. Overall he’s been really good with a .922 SV% and a .943 SV% in January. And yet the Flames haven’t been able to get going fully, other than a seven-game winning streak which they counteracted by failing to win any of the six after that (four losses in OT or SO).
If Smith isn’t the problem, the offense is. Before the outburst against Tampa, they’d managed eight goals in five games. And Edmonton, LA, and Buffalo were part of that slate and you’re supposed to get goals against them currently. Basically if Johnny Gaudreau’s line doesn’t score, the Flames won’t. Michael Frolik has returned to reassemble the 3M line and give them something of a second option, and they’re slowly trying to fortify the bottom six with a couple kids like Mark Jankowski and Andrew Mangiapane. Also, Kris Versteeg looks like he might make it back before the season ends, but if you’re in a place where you need Kris Versteeg you’re probably in a place that has no running water.
The Flames aren’t clean on defense either. Mark Giordano and Dougie Hamilton have been just about the best pairing in the West all year. But below that, T.J. Brodie and Travis Hamonic are in a competition to see which can turn the other more into unidentifiable ooze all season. Michael Stone lives below that and that’s definitely a place that doesn’t have running water. And for some reason Glen Gulutzan won’t play Dougie enough to make a difference. Strange days, indeed.
Stop us if you’ve heard this before, but the Flames’ power play is also holding them back, and unlike the Hawks it has a couple natural QBs to run it. Their penalty killing hasn’t been as good either, and in this league special teams can make a huge difference. They won’t find much sympathy here, of course.
Now to the Hawks. There’s been yet another reshuffle, and it appears that Q’s patience with Brandon Saad has come to an end. Toews’s line remains the same (does anybody remember laughter?). Artem Anisimov moves back in between Schmaltz and Kane. On the surface this is a little frustrating, but then you remember that Wide Dick Arty is pretty much useless unless he’s playing with Kane and you have to maximize what you have. Saad is going to play with Wingels and Hartman as Q wants to keep Jurco-Kampf-Vinnie Smalls together, and with good cause. What a Saad-Wingels-Hartman line does is anyone’s guess, as we’ve said about the third line all season. What it might do is force Saad to start creating his own chances, which is in his holster but we don’t see very often. Or he can continue to drift aimlessly through games. He’s now gotten called out in the press by his coach, which is usually the last card Q wants to play. Now or never, bud.
It’s Judgement Day for the Hawks over the next couple weeks, as nonsensical as that sentence actually is. They face a bunch of teams around them. They could actually gain ground. But they’d have to put a streak together for more than three or four games, and that’s been beyond them all season. You turn enough corners, all you’ve done is end up where you were.
Game #52 Preview
We’ll talk about how the numbers say the Hawks should have won this game. We’ll look at three goals that Forsberg had no shot on and wonder. We’ll take long-term solace in the fact that most of the younger assets looked good again tonight. But at the end of it all, the Canucks were a $100 gift card that the Hawks carelessly threw in the trash. To the bullets.
– Let’s start with the positives. Toews played an inspiring game for most of the night. He was everywhere in the first and assisted on Top Cat’s teaser in the third period. He drew two penalties, one on a good read followed by some much missed speed, and the second by dancing then brute forcing his way past Troy Stecher. We may have to come to terms with the fact that his 10% shooting percentage might be what he is now, but at least he was positively noticeable tonight.
–Even more comforting was that when Q decided to hit the blender in the third, he kept the Top Cat–Toews–Duclair line together, as he should.
– When the Jurco–Kampf–Vinnie line was together, they were by far the Hawks’s most effective line. Whether that’s because they’re so fast or because the underbelly of the Canucks is so soft is grounds for debate, but they dominated all night. Jurco and Kampf finished with respective CF%s of 75 and 78+(!) at 5v5, while Vinnie, with his bouncing around at the end, ended up with a healthy 60. Kampf looked to double shift a bit in the third too. It’s hard to shake the idea that Kampf could quietly develop into a strong bottom six defensive center, and aside from maybe Toews, he was the best Hawk out there tonight.
– The PP didn’t score again, because by this point it’s obvious what whoever is in charge of it simply slams six Steel Reserve Tall Boys, drops five tabs of acid, shoves the ass-end of a paintbrush as far up his urethra as he can, then humps a wall until he crashes. That said, the triangle of Seabrook, Kane, and Vinnie created a few good chances during the second PP in the second period. But chances aren’t good enough at this point.
– The Saad–Schmaltz–Kane line got completely domed in possession. At some point, we’re going to have to talk about what’s eating Brandon Saad. To this point, the underlying numbers have been good, which has been a fallback defense for the lack of scoring. But tonight’s effort was wanting.
– Seabrook–Gustafsson was on the ice for two goals, and Seabrook looked egregiously bad on Gaunce’s second goal. Seabrook had a 0 CF% through the first and managed to settle at a team low 35% at 5v5. What’s most frustrating is that Gustafsson might be a really good passer and a passable third-pairing guy. His CF% WITH Seabrook at 5v5 was a paltry 40, but away from him, it was 63+. But we’ve been here time and time again. It’s no use shouting for Seabrook to sit, because really, what else do they have? Forsling? Franson? Slava fucking Voynov? Six more years.
– Ryan Hartman didn’t see many, if any, shifts after his tripping penalty on whichever Sedin submitted his Oscar clip in the second. It hasn’t been a good few weeks for the former first rounder. But then again, what exactly is it that his line, with Anisimov and Wingels tonight, is supposed to do?
– Tough break for Forsberg, who looked good early. The first goal was on him, with Oesterle deferring to the passing lane. You’ll usually take even a backup goalie one on one against Gaunce, but Forsberg let it slip by. But from then on, it was the same old shit, with an unfortunate redirect, a tip, and Brent Seabrook dropping his pants and pissing in the crease doing him in.
– Off the ice, I loved listening to Eddie during the intermissions. He was no bullshit about not letting this game get away, and it was nice to hear.
– At the beginning of the second, Foley practically fell victim to the vapors as he tripped over himself to say how much he liked Bettman’s stance on goalie interference. For those who missed it, Bettman commented about how referees need to trust their instincts and “watch the replay at full speed” instead of slow motion. If that’s really what Bettman thinks, then what’s the fucking point of the goalie-interference replay in the first place? Isn’t watching at full speed and trusting your instincts precisely what referees do for a living? Fuck off, Gary, you no-responsibility-taking wet fart.
This was a game the Hawks had to have, and they filled their diapers. But DeBrincat and Schmaltz scored pretty goals, Kampf led all players in possession at 5v5, Kempný and Murphy led the possession share for Hawks D-men at 5v5, and away from Seabrook, Gustafsson was good. If the Hawks make the playoffs, it will be on a wing and a prayer, but the future isn’t as terribly bleak as the present looks.
Onward.
Beer du Jour: Tommyknocker Imperial Nut Brown, then High Life.
Line of the Night: “Unlucky break halfway up the guy’s shaft.” –Steve Konroyd, describing a shot in the second period, I assume.
After three weeks of the Hawks essentially either getting their dicks kicked in or playing well enough to win but finding a way to lose, tonight was a welcome outburst of good hockey. Especially after Detroit was one of the teams that did the dick-kicking-in just last Sunday. This is what the Wings get for putting their shitty team in a shitty town and naming their arena after shitty pizza. TO DA BULLETS MY FRENT
– Give me more DeBrincat-Toews-Duclair. Give me all of it. The three of them went 56.25-62.16-58.82 on CF, respectively, and each found the score sheet (finally, in Captain Woke’s case). DeBrincat recorded a Cat Trick (yeah I said it, fuck off) and an assist, Duclair found the net after an absolutely orgasmic passing play from Keith and Top Cat to go with 2 assists, and Toews notched a helper on a nice rush that led to Top Cat’s second goal. As John said yesterday, as long as Toews can figure out he doesn’t have as much time as he wants to think he does to make plays, this line has chemistry, and the speed and skill of the two wingers will hopefully help Toews find more production.
– More on the Duclair goal. Please go watch it here. Granted, it is off a faceoff, which helps a little bit in catching the Wings on their heels. But can you imagine if the Hawks moved the puck with that sort of urgency on a power play instead of everybody standing around with their dick in the hands every time. If I’m Q, I’m sitting the whole team down in front of the video screen when they get back from break and just saying “DO THIS ON THE POWER PLAY.” Maybe they could score a damn PPG against a team not from Canada.
– The third line of Wingels, Anisimov, and Heart Man was one of the few low spots for the Hawks in this game. And they were a very low spot. All three of them got absolutely skull fucked on shot shares, with Heart Man and Anisimov both posting 33.33 rates and Wingels below that at 32%. Those were -22.83 and -24.94 compared to the team rate for the game, which is just pathetic. Even adjusting for score and venue, Natural Stat Trick has all three around 40%. To echo John from last night’s wrap again, this is further evidence that the Hawks aren’t gonna be able to roll a 3+1. And if maybe for some reason this third line was intended as the 1 and rather than part of the 3, that might actually make this look a lot worse.
– Guess which defenseman led all Hawks blue liners with a 60% CF. Connor Murphy, bitches. It’s becoming evident that Sam’s assertion that Murph is this team’s best defenseman this year is correct, and Q’s diaper filling over Hjammer is just sad. Murphy also tallied the primary assist on Top Cat’s first goal, which got the night started. Fuck you and your press box, Joel.
– Ant Man Forsberg was fine in the net tonight, but he still too scrambly-panicky for me to truly comfortable with him, even as a main backup. I am not sure what options there are out there, but I almost wonder if Stan shouldn’t investigate adding one of the league’s better backups via trade. There’s still enough here for the team to maybe sneak into the playoffs if they get reliable goaltending, and I am not sure you’re getting that from Glass/Forsberg. But it’s also about more than this year. Again, I am not sure Forsberg is really a good backup, and those can prove to be important throughout a regular season. Points won or lost when your backup is in can impact playoff seeding. So a good backup who might have some controlability moving forward, and maybe some potential to take the starter’s mantle in the coming years (Crow is only getting older and that brain can only get more mushy) could be a wise investment.
– For being “HOCKEY TOWN,” Shitty Pizza Arena sure had a lot of very obviously empty seats tonight. Shit, you can see a lot in that photo above. Not that Chicago is one to talk cuz ticket prices are dropping like bricks around here and seats are opening up in the UC like mad, too. But with opening a brand new arena, and this being the only Chicago-Detroit matchup in the Motor City this year, I was a little surprised to see how empty the arena was. Just another fly dropping to the NHL attendance plague. Ho Hum.
– Look, it’s only Detroit. They’re not great. But this kind of effort is one we hadn’t really seen from the Hawks since the ass whooping they gave Ottawa, who is also bad. And this is also the same Detroit team that kicked the Hawks dick in 11 days ago. If it is indicative of what’s to come for this team (and that is a BIG if), there is reason to think this team can find the playoffs. Maybe.
For the first time, I’ve seen a real wave of sentiment that the Hawks need to make a major change behind the bench. Some have suggested in the front office. We joke about it here a lot, and we certainly criticize the decorated Hawks coach more than most. But it’s never so simple, and before the Hawks or anyone could conclude that this would be the right course of action one has to figure out what the intent of this season and what is really going on here first.
As we’ve talked about at length on the podcast, it’s hard to know what to think when we don’t know what exactly what Stan Bowman had in mind for this season. If the Hawks thought they could or were in any way inclined to be as transparent as other teams in town, what would they have told us before the season? I can’t take credit for the idea, it’s Fifth Feather’s, but there’s two ways this could have gone.
One is that this is truly a transitional season for the Hawks. One they probably should have embarked on a year ago or maybe even right after the last Cup, but that’s another discussion. That if they’d said while they wish to be competitive and make the playoffs, the main objective of this season was to bed in Schmaltz, DeBrincat, Forsling (whoops), now Duclair, Murphy, and let’s throw in Hinostroza and Sikura at the end for funsies (Kampf too if you want). That really what they wanted to get these players reps, ingrained, evaluated, and then have whoever makes the cut ready for one last assault on the summit next year, which is all you’re going to get with the aging “Core Five.”
And on that level, some of the decisions make some sense? I have to put a “?” there because I’m not really sure. If you wanted to see how Forsling and Rutta would do in the deep end, you’d give them the most d-zone starts of everyone. Which Q did. I guess if you squint you’d see if Murphy can play both sides, which he’s proven he can. But that seems a stretch. You’d try Top Cat as a playmaker on a lot of lines instead of a finisher…maybe? This is Schmaltz’s first real run at center, which you’d definitely do.
But on this level, the mistakes are greater than that. It was clear early on that Forsling wasn’t built to start so much in his own end, and a player who openly talked about losing confidence last year was having his ravaged again by such usage. He was booted off the power play even though that should be something he specializes in. Top Cat set all kinds of records playing the left side in the OHL, and has played there for about 12 minutes here. Isn’t it more prudent to build a player up in the softest spot to have success when he’s 19? And then see what his flexibility is? You could argue it took far too long to let Schmaltz just stay in the middle.
The handling of Murphy is the real red X here, and once again speaks to discord from front office to behind the bench which is the same shit we’ve talked about for years that the Hawks were talented enough to play over in the past but aren’t now. His scratches are simply petulant, given that he’s been the Hawks best d-man over the season. This is Q still bitching that his toy in Hammer–his declining, aging, slowing toy that was about to be more expensive–was taken away. While he’s certainly within his rights to be cranky, did Stan and Q never have a meeting after last season where it was laid out what the plan was? Should your coach be so gobsmacked at a trade as Q clearly was last summer? While we’ve seen the problems when Q gets a say in player decisions, or anyone above Stan does as well, I’m not sure that he should be in the dark either.
The more I watch this team the more I think this really was the plan, because everything Stan has done has been to get younger, faster, cheaper, and open up more space for his draft picks which hasn’t always been the case. And maybe if this team is ready to “go for it” next year (highly debatable what that would actually result in), you’d want Q there because that’s what he does. He’s just not the best for development, and that ignores whether or not some of the veterans have tired of his voice (which we’ll never prove).
If you take the other tack, that this year was about “ONE GOAL” as it always is, it’s gets murkier. There isn’t much Q can do to overcome the loss of Corey Crawford. Q can’t make Toews and Saad score. But even before that, if the goal was to amass as many points as possible. then why were Forsling and Rutta in the d-zone so much and on the kill? Why is Patrick Sharp anywhere near the top six? How can you have this power play? And how can it change personnel and tactics seemingly every opportunity? The scratching of Murphy makes even less sense in this context. Gustafsson and Oesterle going from either the minors or pressbox straight onto both special teams is confounding. If it was about development, it would make slightly more sense, but wouldn’t at least Oesterle have played from jump street?
These are all answers we won’t get because I don’t know what the long term or even short term goals were here. The simplest explanation is that Stan is remaking the entire roster under that “Core Five” (yes, Seabrook doesn’t really count anymore but he’s not going anywhere) either to give them one last chance either next year or preparing the ground for when they aren’t the front of this team anymore. But it doesn’t seem like his coach is playing the same game, once again.
And if that’s going to be the case going forward, one has to go. And Stan’s never gotten to hire a coach before.
The Blackhawks and Red Wings played a hockey game at 11:30am on a gosh darn Sunday morning. On the same weekend as an NFL Playoff Game. That decision by the NHL alone was stupid, but it was not the stupidest part of this game. Just let me get through this:
– The Red Wings got started early with a goal less than five minutes in. This goal was comical on the Blackhawks part because Anthony Anthony-see-you (or something like that) took the puck wide below the goal line and then somehow put it through three Blackhawks to a waiting Dylan Larkin. He had a wide open net, and even if he didn’t Jeff Glass was in goal, so he scored. The three Hawks that allowed the pass through them were Keith, Oesterle, and Schmaltz. So.
– The second goal came from Mike Green, who slammed a one-timer home after a not-very-intimidating rush by the Wings was answered by a completely uninspired and careless back check by the Blackhawks. There were 3 Hawks going back with the play to try and stop 4 Wings, and right after Green scored the other two Hawks came into the picture – they were Brandon Saad and Vinostroza. First banner moment for this line of the day, more to come!
– The second period was basically nothing worth noting, though one moment that did stick out was an actually good save that Jeff Glass made! Except it was only a necessary save because he completely overcommitted as Ant-man came up the wing wide below the net (funny, he kept doing that and kept getting away with it), then basically froze up and looked around like “well shit, I’m fucked” before realizing the puck was still behind the net and he reacted like a lame duck, flopping across the crease and and barely stopping the puck. So good job cleaning up your own mess, Jeff! Please go away now.
-Goal number three. Oh, goal number three. A two on two rush toward the home team’s net, as both teams change, in the third period probably *should* bode well for the home team, because their bench is closer to the net. However, as Ray Ferraro emphasized for us, Anthony Mantha left his bench and skated 100 feet to take a pass and score a goal before a Blackhawks forward even got into the camera shot. That forward was Jonthan Toews. Hooray.
– I don’t even care about what happened on the fourth goal. It was a mess and the game was already over when it happened. The game was probably already over when Larkin scored.
– PLEASE LET THIS BE THE END OF JEFF GLASS. He isn’t a good story, no matter what every single fucking broadcast team on the Hawks games say. Pretty much every good moment he’s had has just been him cleaning up a mess of his own making, through bad rebound control or a bad read or both. 30 year old NHL rookies do not suddenly become actually good NHL goalies. Just end this pain before it consumes us all. And Corey Crawford please come back soon.
This is the outcome you expect when you’re playing a team that has scored nine goals since its last regulation win eight games ago. The Oilers, once again, have managed to be a zoo without cages despite having a generational talent in David McConnor, and the Hawks took two points they needed on a drag-ass Sunday afternoon tilt. To the bullets.
– Let’s begin with the past in front: Nick Schmaltz’s game-opening goal is the sort of thing that should give Hawks fans the same sense of anticipation we all felt in the 08–09 season. His read off Rutta’s point shot was obscene, and he made Kris Russell look like the overrated pile of hockey garbage no one in broadcast wants to admit he is. Even better, Schmaltz gave Ryan Nugent-Hopkins every reason to have the long face he has, using him as a screen en route to an embarrassingly beautiful backhand against Cam “(Used to Be a) Cha-Cha” Talbot.
– On the topic of Jan Rutta, he had himself a nice game after a four-game absence. He carried a 56 CF% (and a precisely even 0.00 CF% Rel) and racked up an assist on Schmaltz’s wizardry. But no matter what, there’s absolutely no justification for slotting Rutta in place of Connor Murphy, who, over the past month, has been the best Hawks D-man by just about every metric. I get that Murphy had a rough go of it against Vegas, but unless Murphy were hurt or had the runs, scratching him is absurd.
Going further, I don’t think that Rutta’s good performance was a coincidence. Before his streak of sitting, he had begun to look sluggish and overpowered after several hockey writers, including yours truly, were champing at the bit to anoint him the savior of the Hawks’s blue line. It’s almost as if Rutta needs some extended time off during the season to recharge. There’s another Hawks D-man who probably needs it too, but it isn’t Murphy.
I know that we probably won’t ever see Seabrook as a healthy scratch because of this bullshit LEADERSHIP narrative that’s served as nothing more than justification for Seabrook’s contract, which the organ-I-zation threw at him like a farm boy throws a wedding ring at the girl who took his virginity. But I think that you’ll get better results letting Rutta slot in for Seabrook over Murphy or Kempný (who had a 59 CF% today). Both Rutta and Seabrook are right-handed shots who have shown signs of exhaustion throughout the season, and what would be a better example of leadership for Bottomless Pete than admitting that you don’t have the energy to play 82 games a year and give other, more physically fit players a slot to play? Fantasies, I know.
– Back in reality, there’s no doubt that Cam Talbot sucks. DeBrincat’s goal had no business ending up in the back of the net, since all Top Cat wanted to do was try to center Sharp. Nonetheless, credit where it’s due, as David Struggle had no trouble shrugging off a checking attempt from EA Sports–generated name Matt Benning behind the goal line to feed Top Cat. Kampf has looked pretty alright in his six games up, and he’s made that third line work somehow, as he, Top Cat, and Sharp had respective CF%s of 57+,61+, and 64+ today. It doesn’t have to make sense for you to take it.
– We got a taste of vintage Toews on the Hawks’s third goal. After Vinnie Hinostroza horsed Darnell Intern, both by skating by him and dropping a beauty of a backhand pass to Toews, Toews did that thing that makes me hope they retire his number with a “C” someday where he overpowers a defender and makes a one-handed pass to a drooling Brandon Saad. While one play does not a season make, it was nice to see Toews see a result for all the strong underlying numbers he’s had this year.
– Saad had a goal and 60 CF% at evens, but the eye test was a bit more mixed. He got pantsed by McDavid in the first and Draisaitl in the third, and he knuckle-pucked a nice pass from Vinnie in a high-danger zone in the third. Not to say that Saad isn’t a brute force, but today looked a little less godlike than I’m used to. I get he was up against the McDavid line, but he looked a bit more janky than normal.
– Gustav Forsling had a 61+ CF% at evens spending almost two-thirds of his time in the offensive zone. IT’S ALMOST AS IF THAT’S WHERE HE BELONGS.
– Aside from the weak Nurse goal, Forsberg looked good today. His rebound control is a much needed salve after watching Good Story Glass Jeff bounce biscuits off his pads for far, far longer than is acceptable for a team looking to vault into a wild card spot. Still, without Crawford, this team is going to run in place.
– I’m glad Eddie O. is healthy enough to do games again, but the way he toed the company line today made me look forward to Konroyd’s opium-den droning in Ottawa on Tuesday. Between blowing kisses at StanBo for signing Bouma and Wingels while the Hawks sit in last place in the division, lauding Seabrook for tapping on Forsberg’s pads after a bad goal, and chiding Kempný for an aggressive pinch in the second period (despite the fact that that’s what Kempný is good at doing), it almost made me miss Konroyd at home. I’m getting awfully tired of this SEABROOK IS A LEADER justification for his shit performance, and Eddie O. is the prime evangelist.
Oh, Jordan Oesterle had an unassisted goal today. To piggyback off this feat, the mantra of the upcoming week of hockey can only be KEEP FIRING, ASSHOLES!
Beer du Jour: Two Hearted
Line of the Night: “I love that play from Brent Seabrook.” –Eddie O. commenting on Brent Seabrook tapping Anton Forsberg’s pads after a soft goal, which is neither a play nor a way to justify Seabrook’s piss-poor performance anymore. It’s 2018, not 2013.
vs. 
RECORDS: Hawks 18-14-6 Rangers 21-13-5
PUCK DROP: 7pm
TV: NBCSN – It’s Rivalry Night, don’t ya know?
NEW YORK MIGHT BE THE WORST ST. VINCENT SONG EVER: Blueshirt Banter, @HockeyRodent
It’s not officially cold until it gets cold in New York, which it has been now, and you can hear their bitching about it from Oregon. Meanwhile this is par for the course for us, but who gives a shit when we’re here in the middle, busy sending all of our creative talent there to do the work they take credit for? Exactly. Anyway, it’s rivalry night apparently and I guess this counts because it’s two Original Six teams, though you’re forgiven if you forgot that the Rangers were an O6 teams because really… what’s Rangers tradition?
BUT THAT’S NOT WHY YOU CALLED.
The Hawks wrap up this weird six-game trip that’s bounced from Texas to the East Coast, to Western Canada, back to the East Coast, rippin’ and rompin’, North Cak-a-laka and Compton (not actually Compton). It wrapped around Christmas so the Hawks didn’t have to do it all in one, but it also makes it seem like it’s gone on forever. The fact that the Hawks piled up only one win during it, three terrible losses and one credible point I guess in Cal And Gary only made it seem longer. Which leaves us in this state of ennui we currently find ourselves.
As far as on the ice. there will be more changes. Because of course there will. Once again, Richard Panik goes from top line to pressbox in Q’s Rotation Of Confusion, with Vinnie Smalls getting a chance to do whatever it is he does with Toews and Saad. Patrick Sharp comes back from exile (handsome exile!) to be on the other side of David Kampf from Top Cat, forcing Top Cat back to the right side because whatever Baby Sharp wants Baby Sharp gets, I guess.
It spreads to the defense as well, where Gustav Forsling will slot back in to pair with Cody Franson, which won’t have the Rangers forwards giggling until they foam up at the mouth or anything. Personally, I can’t wait for Forsling to get horsed in the corner, the puck making its way to the slot and Franson kind of staring at it with a bemused expression as one might a squirrel dragging a too big piece of food up a tree. After starting the shift in their own end, of course.
Jeff Glass gets his third straight start, as horse-player Q thinks this is finally the Pick 3 he’s going to hit. This is simply asking for trouble, as the “spark” Q was looking for by starting this good story has not materialized, and has in fact has had his skaters playing terrified and panicked in their own zone as Glass spits up another rebound. It has the double effect of fucking with Anton Forsberg’s head, and with Corey Crawford nowhere on the horizon that seems a real problem. Glass is going to give up a touchdown somewhere around here, because he’s not Tim Thomas, and it’s going to be in a game the Hawks can’t really afford to just punt. Forsberg has had his spotty games for sure, but also has the better chance of holding a team below two which he’s done as well. But Q gets to play his hunches because fuck you.
To the Rangers, who are one of the weirder statistical teams you can find. They’ve fallen six points behind the division leading Caps, but have two games in hand. What’s bewildering about the Rangers is that they’re one of the worst possession teams in the league, and yet they create the best chances out of the limited attempts they take. They’re #1 in expected goals at evens per 60 minutes, even though you’d be hard pressed to find a genuine first-liner anywhere on this team. They give up a lot of attempts as well, but not that many great chances.
It also helps that Henrik Lundqvist went a bit bonkers in December, with a .936 SV%. So that talk of him being finished in October seems to have dried up a bit. That helped the Rags to a 7-3-3 record in the month, and they’ll be coming off a truly inspiring OT win in the Winter Classic against the modern day irresistible force that is the Buffalo Sabres.
The Rangers are a little beat up at the moment, as Chris “I Still Give Guys Swirlies” Kreider is out indefinitely with a blood clot in his arm, and so is Jesper Fast. The Rangers weren’t blessed with a huge amount of depth, so it’s kind of stripped their second line. Unless a troika of Buchnevich-Desharnais-Vesey scares you. The top unit of Alleged Wiener Tucker and The Two Z’s has been dynamite possession-wise but not a whole lot of end product yet. It’s the bottom six where the real threat lies, with Michael Grabner and 18 goals, Captain Stairwell, and J.T. Miller always possible to pop up with a goal. There are no big names–Nash really isn’t a top line player any more–but the foot soldiers have gotten enough done.
They’ve had problems getting Kirk ShattenKevin to fit in all season, and he’s currently on a third-pairing with worst player in the world Brendan Smith. Most of their push comes from Chance-Made-Me-Famous Brady Skjei (and the funny thing about that sketch is that Skjei is American). McDonagh and Holden take the human shield assignments, and expect Schmaltz and Kane to see them every shift.
Feels like every time I show up here and say the Hawks need to kick it into gear and blah blah blah, Kesha. Perhaps it’s just not going to happen and this is what they are. The Hawks are going to pack in the games now before their bye week, with seven games in the next 12 days. It is likely that when we get to the end of that stretch, we’ll know if the rest of the season is worth any give-a-shit or not.
Game #39 Preview
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Game Time: 8:00PM CST
TV/Radio: NBC Sports Chicago, Various SportsNet Affiliates, WGN-AM 720
Peter Pocklington’s Hairpiece: Copper N Blue, Oilers Nation
With no time to mull over whatever the fuck that was last night in Vancouver, the Hawks stay in Western Canada and head to its northern reaches in Edmonton, where they find an Oilers squad in a similar situation to themselves, with their season still stuck in second gear as well.
Hey all, it’s been a few days. Had a good break, I hope. Spent it with your family either arguing about minuscule stuff or just being drunk… and arguing about minuscule stuff. As Hawks fans, or just Hawks watchers, you even get an extra day before we dive right back into it all. Good thing, too. Anyway, thought it would be time to air all our previous grievances from before the break to see where we are. Post-Festivus, let’s say.
These will probably sound familiar to most of you, but hey, sometimes you can’t get blood from a turnip or stone or rock or whatever the fuck these freaks are trying to get blood from. Which is actually very weird. I don’t want blood. I’m not a fucking vampire. Fifth Feather, he’s the vampire wannabe.
BUT THAT’S NOT WHY YOU CALLED.
Basically, everything that follows is my complaints about how this team has been managed. And yes, I think Q has done a borderline shitty job this year after doing yeoman’s work the past two years, I would argue. Whether he has just nothing to work with (and I really don’t believe that), is still in a snit from watching pet projects Hjalmarsson and Panarin dealt, or quite simply just doesn’t quite care as much anymore, I have no idea. But here’s where he’s losing me:
-The distribution of zone starts to his defense. This has been the dead horse we’ve already turned into paste at this point. But to repeat: the two d-men who have taken the biggest percentage of their shifts starting in the defensive zone are Jan Rutta and Gustav Forsling. They also might double as the two worst defensive players on the Hawks blue line, though Seabrook or Franson could poke their head into the room and say, “Is that your final answer?” in some awful, CBS-sitcom fashion that this season has felt at times.
This is just plainly stupid. Despite the broadcast’s/organization’s Pravda-like spreading of the gospel of Forsling, he sucks in his own zone. Like, out loud. And that’s fine for now. That can take some time to learn, and especially when the Hawks have other options. Take Forsling’s use with that of Will Butcher’s on New Jersey. He and Forsling are about the same size, similar skill-set. Butcher almost never starts in his own zone, and has 23 points. Forsling has 12. You can’t tell me that Butcher is that much more talented than Forsling.
Q might sit here and say that Forsling and Rutta aren’t the only ones who need to be kept out of their own zone, that Seabrook and Franson need the help, too. That isn’t necessarily wrong, but A. Franson shouldn’t be playing that much and B. Seabrook’s bigger problems are in transition so maybe just planting him in his own zone where he doesn’t have to worry about streaking forwards or puck retrievals might actually be the safer plan.
Duncan Keith is still good. He can take it on. He can probably save Rutta from himself, which Forsling most certainly can’t. Or if you’re still in love with Connor Murphy on his off-side, you can pair him with Rutta. Because if Murphy can keep Seabrook from choking on a ham-bone, he certainly can do the same with Rutta. Or better yet get Kempny out of the doghouse and just let him play because he’s good and shoots himself in the face with a bazooka less than Forsling does.
-Nick Schmaltz is a center, Ryan Hartman is not. Yes, I know Hartman played some center in junior. Yes, I know that Q loves to come up with solutions out of nowhere to satisfy is giant, throbbing brain. But if the Hawks ever thought Hartman could play center at this level, they should have at least had him do it some of the time in Rockford. So not only are you asking him to play a spot he hasn’t as a pro, you’re also asking him to do it after four seasons of not.
I understand the problems with Schmaltz at center. He can’t win a draw, and he’s slight. And yet there he is on the penalty kill, so Q must think he’s not completely helpless defensively. Yes, I know Arty The One Man Party is kind of useless if he’s not playing with Kane, and that’s another problem. But the world is dying for Top Cat-Nick At Nite-Kane. Let us just see it for a game or two.
This gets into a larger, organizational discussion, because Vinnie Smalls was brought up to play center, except he hasn’t played center at Rockford all season. Does Q know this? Whatever the answer is, I don’t feel good about it. Imagine the Cubs or Sox bringing up an infielder and then sticking him in center without him ever playing there in the AAA. Yes yes, stick your Kyle Schwarber jokes here.
-Saad and Toews need a playmaker. This has been obvious all season. The three seasons we had of Saad-Toews-Hossa scoring simply because they willed it into being are gone. Hossa has leprosy, Toews just isn’t that player anymore. They’ll keep the puck in the right areas, they just need help making that count. We saw Top Cat on the left side for like two games, and then it was abandoned so he could return to playing with corpses. Give it five, give it ten, because if you don’t get Toews and Saad scoring regularly, we can just dock this showboat right now.
-Did they rush Crawford from injury? The easy way out of this is to say that decision is the Hawks medical staff’s and Crawford’s. And yet this would hardly be the first time we’ve seen this under Q. Well, now Crow is out again. I guess it was necessary for those games against Buffalo, Arizona, and Florida with how they went, but it shouldn’t have been.
Look, I get it. Q’s cards aren’t great. He has no third line because Patrick Sharp died and Richard Panik had the temerity to turn back into Richard Panik (by the way Josh Jooris is kicking ass for the Canes, and is younger, faster, and cheaper than Patrick Sharp. I’m just gonna sit here and cry). That’s forced the fourth line into harder assignments than you’d like. The defense is a bit mismatched, but Q’s making that worse.
The Hawks only sit one point out of a playoff spot and have games in hand on everyone. It’s hardly disaster, it’s just not where we’re used to being. But it it’s going to get better, removing head from anus is always a good start, as my father used to tell me regularly.
