Box Score
Event Summary
Natural Stat Trick

Look, at this point it’s a cliche, but it always happens. The Hawks go into West East St. Louis on a Saturday night, that team teetering on quitting on whatever coach they currently have behind the bench and with the florid-faced, meth-addled MAGA chuds in attendance baying for blood from the word “go”. Sometimes the Hawks rope-a-dope and let the Blues skate themselves out of position and eventually turn to retaliatory bullshit, and others, like tonight, the pucks go in (extremely) early and the Blues walk away with two points having left everyone feel dirtier for having watched it.

• Tonight was another study in neo-cubist defensive positioning, and it wasn’t just the utterly atrocious pairing of Brandon Manning and Jan Rutta, though at least Rutta finally got his ass benched and didn’t see a shift in the entire second half of the game. Henri Jokiharju was across the river on the Blues second goal, and he and Duncan Keith had a rough go of things all night long. The forwards didn’t help either, as Dominik Kahun did his best Roger Dorn impersonation on Ryan O’Reilly in the game’s opening seconds.
• This is the most anyone has been forced to watch John Hayden handle the puck likely since he attended hockey camp in junior high (the last time he attended a meaningful class in school, don’t believe that Yale bullshit), and he’s going to give everyone an eye infection if he keeps pulling up just inside the blue line to set up shop and look for a pass.
• The Toews line was basically nowhere to be found tonight, despite a 62% share and Mike Yeo combating Toews with ROR. The line wasn’t nearly dangerous enough, and when only one of the top two lines on this team marks the sheet against even remotely competent teams, the defense is going to have a hard time keeping the hounds at bay.
• Conversely the Saad-Wide Dick-Garbage Dick line were all hovering around 40% and “created” all three goals, as much as anyone creates anything when Jay Gallon is letting in Downey soft bullshit like he was.
• Speaking of which, it could be said that Chad Johnson came in and bailed the Blues out after Allen was rickety even on the shots that hit him right in the solar plexus, but the Hawks didn’t exactly mount a furious rally in the third, when everything was kept to the outside.
• During said “rally” two seperate icings within about 2 minutes of one another were waved off by the linesmen because both Erik Gustafsson and Alexandre Fortin slacked ass on coming back even on a hybrid icing. That’s flat out inexcusable and just as benching-worthy as everything Jan Rutta did (which was plenty).
• Other than the power play goal in garbage time, there really wasn’t a damn thing to be done by Corey Crawford on any of the 5 he allowed. He still looked sharp.
• No time to wallow, as McJesus and his dipshit apostles arrive on West Madison tomorrow having just beat the Preds in Nashville and Cam Ward to shoot at.