Faxes from Uncle Dale

Tag: springsteen sucks

  • Over The River And Into The Muck: Hawks at Devils Preview/Peep Show

     vs. jon_lovitz-devil-snl-46_2

    GAMETIME: 6pm Central

    TV: WGN

    SPRINGSTEEN SUCKS: In Lou We Trust

    RECORDS: Hawks 3-3-1  Devils 3-2-1

    PROJECTED LINEUPS

    blackhawks-lineup-card

    devils-lineup-card

    SCORE-ADJUSTED CF%:  Hawks – 51.3% (10th)  Devils – 50.1% (13th)

    POWER PLAY: Hawks – 19.2% (16th)  Devils – 23.8% (9th)

    PENALTY KILL – Hawks – Awful (Dead Ass Last)  Devils – 90.0% (5th)

    TRENDS: Hall has three goals and four points in the past two games, Kyle Quincey… still sucks

    The Hawks will embark on a road game for only the third time this season and the last time this month. They’ll be looking for their first point on the road as well. They’ll have a pretty big chance against yet another non-descript Devils team. In fact, the Devils officially changed their name to “The Non-Descript New Jersey Devils.” You didn’t notice, because no one notices anything the Devils really do.

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  • Mr. Mephistopheles Please: Devils 3 – Hawks 2

    Mr. Mephistopheles Please: Devils 3 – Hawks 2

    Box Score

    Event Summary

    War On Ice

    Natural Stat Trick

    Well, at least they don’t play the Devils again. And at this pace they won’t have to worry about a Final rematch.

    The Hawks tried something new against New Jersey this time, taking a lead and hoping that would force the Devils to be a little looser in their structure. But it was the Hawks who ended up employing that, with a couple defensive gaffes, some less than stellar goalie play, and a poorly timed penalty all adding up to a loss. Combine that in with the Hawks barely looking threatening after the first 20 as the Devils were once again able to basically put sand on their flame, and especially when they got a lead. Capped off by no line other than Kane and The Sons Of Rasputin able to get on the scoresheet, and the Hawks are dancing with .500 again by the pale moonlight.

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