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Old Man Yells About Young Men/Your First Tonight I’m Gonna Rock You Tonight

One of the worst things about hockey is the amount of old, concussed, entitled men who are not just around the game, but actually running it. It seems the only qualification to be the GM or president of a lot of teams, or a broadcaster, is that you can tell people what was the hot spot to hang out at after a game at the Hartford Civic Center (answer: there wasn’t one).

Brendan Shanahan isn’t as old as some, but he’s doing a damn fine impression of them. If you want the detailed version, here you go. If you want the cliff notes, it’s basically that Shanahan thinks everyone player on the Leafs should take less money than they can get to keep the team together, and here’s the kicker, because that’s what they did in Detroit. The money-shot: “At the end of the day we all found a way to fit with each other so that we could keep adding to the group.”

Gee, what could that method have been? I’m not sure, but I think it had something to do with no salary cap and Mike Illitch’s checkbook.

This is Brendan Shanahan, who had to be dealt to the previously mentioned Hartford because of his maximized contract from the Blues. And then traded to Detroit with that same contract.

That same Detroit team that had Sergei Fedorov making $28 million one season due to signing bonuses. That same Wings team that paid Shanahan $3.6 million in 1998, and now think of that in 2018 dollars. Shanahan also made $6 million in 2002, and again, translate that to 2018 dollars. Also on that 2002 team, 104-year-old Brett Hull made $3.5M, Lidstrom made $8.5M, Luc Robitaille made $4M while being older than Hull somehow, Yzerman made $7.5M, Chelios made $5.5M, and the biggest, brain-gooifying fact is that Uwe Krupp made $4.5M. That’s $40 million, in 2002 mind you, for six players.

They’re practically fucking Job, they are!

While it’s a nice thought for Leafs fans, and probably is meant to poison the water for said players against those fans in upcoming negotiations, they don’t owe the Leafs shit. The Leafs are just the team that happened to draft them. 29 other teams would have gladly taken Nylander or Matthews or Marner if the Leafs didn’t. The system is already rigged against most players that are either in their prime or approaching it.

Maybe Shanahan should explain to his fans why they’re paying Patrick Marleau and his oatmeal $6 million for two more seasons or Ron Hainsey $3 million when they need to sign these players. And they still have $30 million in cap space for next year, plus whatever the cap changes.

Shanahan can go get fucked, is what I’m saying. Anyway, here’s tonight’s stuff:

First Screen Viewing

Ducks vs. Sharks – 9:30

Erik Karlsson’s unveiling, and one of the more boisterous joints in the league should be jumping. It’s pretty exciting to see what the Sharks might look like with #65 in tow, and how they handle the expectations. The Ducks are annoyingly metronomic and these games usually turn pretty chippy. The power play the Sharks are sporting could be showtime.

Second Screen Viewing

Canadiens v. Leafs – 6pm

Well of course the season has to start in Toronto. It’s amazing they’ll play games anywhere else, honestly. Still, it’s Tavares’s debut and as much as the noise around them is going to drive us all to drink more, the product on the ice should be highly entertaining. Assuming Mike Babcock doesn’t get in the way. And hey, who doesn’t enjoy the Habs getting paddled?

Other Games

Bruins v. Caps – 6:30

Flames v. Canucks – 9pm

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