Game #68 – Hawks vs. Red Wings: Hedley Lamarr’s Mugs, Pugs, And Thugs

Who The Fuck Are These People? – It was one thing when the Wings fucked off to the Eastern Conference because their precious fans couldn’t stay up past 10pm so they could be up early for the jobs they don’t have, which essentially ruined this rivalry. Also it helped them keep their stupid little playoff streak alive a couple more years so they could get labeled by the Bruins or Lightning a couple times, and they must be so proud. But now that they’re in a full rebuild, we don’t have any idea who any of these jokers they’re running out there are. Or if we do we know enough to not care. Alex Biega? Fabbri Robbie? Patrik Nemeth? These guys have go a far ways north just to get a shoulder shrug. We’d try and build up bile for Dylan Larkin…but really who cares? He’s never played game that mattered and probably won’t for another three years.

Trevor Daley – Dumbest player in the league who plays with chew in his lip. How fucking gross is that? Could it be any more Canadian?

Anthony Mantha – Apparently the Wings always have to have some mule that scores goals for no reason. So here’s Mantha, who skates like a building but yet piles up goals no one will remember. On pace for an prime “Yeah, but who gives a shit?” career.