Faxes from Uncle Dale

Tag: Marian Hossa

  • You Smoke Her Like She’s Incense: Hawks 0 – Blues 1 OT (Blues lead series 1-0)

    Boxscore

    Event Summary

    War On Ice

    I suppose if I were on the other side of this (meaning I was about 50 pounds heavier and hell of a lot uglier and I’m not pretty now), I would say that the Hawks have scored one goal against the Blues in about 130 minutes of play the past two games against them. I would say that it doesn’t matter that the Blues are doing exactly what they shouldn’t against the Hawks, i.e. backing up and trapping and grinding, because even with Keith returning for Game 2 he’s still the only trap-buster the Hawks have. I suppose I would say that the Blues probably can play better and they still have a 1-0 lead.

    But I’m not on that side, so all I can help but say is, “Haven’t we seen this before?”

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  • Innuendo And Out The Other – Bruins vs Hawks Preview, Bloody Mary Bar

    bruins fallon fever pitch vs evil empire

    Game Time: 11:30AM Central
    TV/Radio: NBC, SportsNet, TVA-S, WGN-AM 720
    You White, You Ben Affleck: Cup of Chowder 

    There really is zero excuse for an 11:30 start this morning, as the game isn’t necessarily running as counter programming to anything specific. But the NHL and marketing sensibility have never exactly gone together like bologna and Miracle Whip. So somehow what they’ll bill as in important game between two ORIGINAL SIX teams in its final pre-scheduled Sunday matchup still will start while the vast majority of the country is still sleeping. Great job again, everyone.

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  • Today’s Empires, Tomorrow’s Ashes – Hawks at Jets Preview, Vow Renewal Ceremony

    evil empire at benny the jet

    Game Time: 7:00PM Central
    TV/Radio: CSN, WGN-AM 720
    Sons Of Flin Flon: Arctic Ice Hockey

    Regardless of how long Duncan Keith is suspended for this afternoon- and he will be suspended for at least the remainder of the regular season- the Blackhawks are still in a position wherein they’re for all intents and purposes locked into their playoff spot barring losing the remaining five games or getting a tremendous amount of help from the opponents of the Stars and Blues. And while the former can’t be ruled out, the latter is still an incredibly low probability, as the schedule makers certainly did the Hawks plenty of favors by putting batting practice like the long out-of-it Jets on the schedule for the home stretch.

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  • Angry At Numbers: I Make A Lot Of Graphs

    Angry At Numbers: I Make A Lot Of Graphs

    Something of a new approach to this bit today. One of the things that people have pointed to in this current Hawks’ streak of silliness is that the second line hasn’t scored much. Kane and Pantera have only combined for four points in the past nine games. We’ve been commenting that the top line hasn’t really pulled its weight at even-strength for any length of time this season, and I wanted to see if this has affected how teams have played them. It kind of looks like it has:

    Kane and Toews graph

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  • As Of Now I Beg You’ve Got It Wrong: Flyers 3 – Hawks 2

    As Of Now I Beg You’ve Got It Wrong: Flyers 3 – Hawks 2

    Box Score

    Event Summary

    War On Ice

    It’s clear that Joel Quenneville recognizes what his team’s problems are. Defensive depth, trouble scoring at even-strength, some mismatched lines. He attempted to address them tonight, rightly or wrongly. It didn’t quite work and the Hawks dropped their 4th straight game. If it wasn’t for Panarin’s buzzer-beater in St. Louis, they wouldn’t even have a point in that stretch.

    This one started a lot like the Kings’ game, but for a longer stretch where the Hawks had the upper hand. They actually took the lead this time when Ghost Bear broke his stick and fell over, giving Hossa a runway that he didn’t turn down. Once again, they hit a post or two or Neuvirth made a couple big saves that kept them from extending the lead. The bugaboo of a PK reared it’s ugly head again at the end of the 1st.

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  • Outside The Velvet Ropes: Kings 5 – Hawks 0

    Outside The Velvet Ropes: Kings 5 – Hawks 0

    Box Score

    Event Summary

    War On Ice

    When you play two first place teams in a row, and you lose by a combined score of 10-2, that’s not exactly encouraging. If you chalk it up to the normal nonchalance of the Hawks at this time of year, that’s pretty extreme nonchalance even from them. While this one looks bad, I’m not sure it’s quite as bad as the scoreline would indicate. Although, when they don’t get a power play goal, this has kind of been what it has looked like.

    But to the point, in the first two periods when the game was still either tied, within one, or within two, the Hawks got some prime looks from down low. They hit the post twice, they missed the net twice, and had one or two others saved or deflected that on another night would have turned the game in a vastly different direction. Falling behind the Kings is never a good idea because they can just sit around their net and dare you to get shots through from the point, which is what they did basically after Lecavalier scored. But early in the game, the Hawks could have put themselves right there.

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  • To Hell With Good Intentions – Hawks at Stars Preview, Bolo Tie Enthusiast Convention

    evil empire at Star_69_REM

    Game Time:  7:30PM Central
    TV/Radio: CSN, NHLN (US), SportsNet, WGN-AM 720
    Ernest Givins’ Electric Glide: Defending Big D

    From one BIGGEST GAME OF THE YEAR to the next, the Hawks now travel to Dallas to face the Stars, with whom they are currently tied for the top seed in both the division and conference, but hold the tiebreaker in regulation wins.

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  • As You Were – Hawks at Blues Preview, Dog And Pony Show

    evil empire at bluestrumpet_jersey

    Game Time: 7:00PM Central
    TV/Radio: NBCSN, TVA-S, WGN-AM 720
    Literally A Fucking Radioactive Trash Pile: St. Louis Game Time

    Because literally nothing John McDonough and Jay Blunk do is on accident or by coincidence, the NHL’s quiet announcement that they have concluded their “investigation” of Patrick Kane and have predictably found nothing calls into question a couple other media blips over the past 24 hours.

    First, yesterday afternoon the geniuses running the Hawks’ social media department thought it was important to include Patrick Kane and his mother in a tweet acknowledging International Women’s Day, which is insulting and disgusting. And today it leaked that Sports Illustrated will be doing a (regional) cover story on just how much Garbage Dick has had to overcome this year on his way to being the league’s leading scorer and a Hart Trophy front runner. Because John McDonough is very good at his job, these events are not to be viewed as anything other than deliberate and connected.

    And the purpose of it is potentially two-fold. At the very least, with any bureaucratic loose ends now tied up with the conclusion of the NHL’s farce of an investigation, which allows McDonough and Blunk to start building a ground game and controlling a narrative ahead of what they figure to be a bright and direct spotlight once again on this team into May and June. The second more stomach-churning purpose is for a potential Masterton Trophy nomination, the NHL’s perseverance award for which every team submits its candidate. It would be a tremendously nauseating and ballsy move on their part, considering recent winners include a widower, a bereaved father, and an MS sufferer. But John McDonough is known for big moves after all.

    [extremely sportsy radio host voice]….just like tonight’s big rivalry night tilt in St. Louis between the Blues and Hawks!

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  • Delusions Of Grandeur – Leafs vs Hawks Preview, Arthroscopic Surgery

    show us your songs toronto vs evil empire

    Game Time: 7:30PM Central
    TV/Radio: CSN, NHLN (US), WGN-AM 720
    Please Hire These People So They Will Shut Up: Pension Plan

    The Maple Leafs suck out loud. They barely have an ECHL caliber roster right now. But that’s not the way their craven fanbase sees it.

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  • There’s February: Sharks 2 – Hawks 0

    There’s February: Sharks 2 – Hawks 0

    Box Score

    Event Summary

    War On Ice

    Perhaps it took the home schedule in this month to kick in the winter doldrums we’ve come accustomed to. One game of course does not signal anything. The Sharks, as cloudy and weird as their identity might be in a lot of places, were suffocating in their own zone. While the Hawks mustered up an acceptable number of shots, San Jose cordoned off any prime scoring areas for all 60 minutes. Their backchecking was ferocious. The Hawks love to beat a man to the outside and then hit the late man, but couldn’t do it at all tonight with the retreating Sharks’ forwards blanketing that option. Anything from the outside the pretty sizable Martin Jones is going to stop. Tonight’s shot chart tells something of a story. Hawks didn’t get much below the circles.

    Screen Shot 2016-02-09 at 10.27.05 PM

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