Everything Else

bluestrumpet_jersey vs evil empire

Game Time: 2:00PM Central
TV/Radio: NBC, TVA-S, SportsNet, WGN-AM 720
Holidae In: St. Louis Game Time

After having the tide of the series flip on a dime on two controversial goal calls (and one not at all controversial slashing call), the Blues are now afforded with an opportunity to show the hockey world that their continual, perennial faith in them is justified. To show them, yes indeed, this time it will be different.

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evil empire at imos blues

Game Time: 8:30PM CDT
TV/Radio: CSN, NBCSN, SportsNet360, TVA-S, WGN-AM 720
If A Urinal Cake Were A Town: St. Louis GameTime

As far as inevitabilities go, the Hawks and Blues meeting in the first round of the playoffs this year is right up there with death, taxes, and David Haugh writing something profoundly ignorant, stupid, and damaging. And with this series, all of the old war horses once again will be trotted out, from the Hawks “turning it on” and hockey followers everywhere from local to national believing beyond a shadow of a doubt that this time it will be different for the Blues.

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wileEcoyote vs evil empire

Game Time: 7:30PM Central
TV/Radio: CSN, WGN-AM 720
I Hope Joe Arpaio Is Tortured To Death: Five For Howling

It took until game 80 on April 5th for the schedule to finally roll around to a game of actual consequence that the Blackhawks on paper should give a shit about. Sitting at 99 points with three games to play, they can max out at 105, which is the current total for both the Stars and Blues. If the Hawks win tonight as they should, and can beat the Blues on Thursday, that at least puts home ice still seriously on the table on Saturday, as the Blues face the Caps in the closer, and the Hawks would hold the definitive edge in ROWs. There’s still barely a chance at the division as well, but on top of needing help from the Caps, the Stars get what could be an already eliminated Avs team on Thursday and then a locked-into-seventh Preds club for the finale. But failure to accumulate all six of the remaining points available makes all of this moot, and it begins tonight at home against the Coyotes.

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predator vs evil empire

Game Time: 7:30PM Central
TV/Radio: CSN Plus, SportsNet, WGN-AM 720
All The Young Dudes: On The Forecheck

Tonight with the visiting Predators on the frigid near west side, the Hawks will close out a four game homestand before a swing through the two self-appointed capitals of the hockey universe in Toronto and Montreal, and close out January playing 6 of its final 8 games on the road. And the team the Preds ice tonight is drastically different than the one they brought about a month ago, and not necessarily for the better.

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evil empire vs budicepenguintin

Game Time: 6:00PM Central
TV/Radio: CSN, SportsNet, WGN-AM 720
Ben Roethlisberger Is A Gray Dicked Rapist: PensBurgh

In a matchup of rivals that never were, much to the chagrin of Gary Bettman and NBCSN (despite what they’re pitting tomorrow’s game as), the Hawks travel to Pittsburgh for the first of yet another inter-conference mid-week home and home knocking out the season series in 27 hours. And in an even more remarkable turn of events, both Jonathan Toews and Sidney Crosby are upright for at least tonight’s contest, something that’s eluded both of them in this non-existent battle. Though to what degree is debateable.

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wildthings vs evil empire

Game Time: 7:00PM Central
TV/Radio: CSN, NBCSN (National), WGN-AM 720
Labour Issues In The Toy Department: Hockey Wilderness

As the broadcast will assuredly punish the listening audience with 7 million reminders of by puck drop, the first game back at home after a road trip is always a TRAP GAME. And it’s even moreso of one by some moronic logic because the Wild have lost 6 of 7 coming into tonight. Or it could just be that they’re just perpetually mediocre.

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jon_lovitz-devil-snl-46_2 vs evil empire

Game Time: 7:30PM Central
TV/Radio: CSN, WGN-AM 720
Bruce Springsteen Is A Fraud And A Charlatan: All About The Jersey

After one of the more vomit-inducing, aesthetically displeasing performances of the Quenneville era last Friday in Newark, the Devils complete the season series tonight at the United Center fresh off getting shut out by West East St. Louis on Tuesday at home.

Everything Else

3ec3960d0a1f1aacf42839c40e09d2a5_400x400 vs oldschool

Game Time:  7:30PM Central
TV/Radio: CSN+ (ch 285 HD), no radio
Big Money Rustlas: WIIM, A2Y

If the lines around the block from the United Center of weirdos and the unemployable yesterday afternoon and evening for a scrimmage weren’t indication enough, hockey is back. At least it kind of is as the slate of pre-season dry humps kicks off tonight against the visiting Wings.