Faxes from Uncle Dale

Recent Posts

  • Recipe For Hate – Hawks at Kings Preview, Leftover Feast

    evil empire at king

    Game Time: 9:30PM Central
    TV/Radio: WGN Ch. 9, WGN-AM 720
    Fountain and Fairfax: The Royal Half, Jewels From The Crown

    Tonight the Hawks will conclude their annual November two-week displacement from the United Center at the hands of Sirs Barnum and Bailey on Figueroa against the Kings, who are taking a novel approach to their regular season by at least cultivating the image that they give a shit about it. But much like their visiting counterparts, they still do not give a shit about women or human decency. 

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  • Never Gonna Get Gonna Get It: Hawks 2 – Ducks 2 (Hawks win calf-roping)

    Never Gonna Get Gonna Get It: Hawks 2 – Ducks 2 (Hawks win calf-roping)

    Box Score

    Event Summary

    War On Ice

    Natural Stat Trick

    I made a TLC reference on Twitter earlier, so I figure I might as well throw En Vogue in now. I want to stay on message, after all.

    It wasn’t vintage stuff from the Hawks. They were rolled in the 1st and didn’t even look all that threatening in most of the last two periods except for the odd shift from Kaner and The Sons Of Rasputin. What this afternoon did show is that the Ducks remain the Ducks, and no matter how good they might look for a stretch (and I’m sure some Ducks observers would say the first 50 minutes is about as good as they’ve looked all season), they’re still just good enough to fuck it up.

    The Ducks had it under control, even with Crawford pulled. There was utterly no reason for Ryan “White Hats Are Still Cool To Me” Getzlaf to take that penalty against Shaw, other than he isn’t allowed to light his own farts on the ice. While the Ducks have the best kill in the league at the moment, you’re asking for it to give the Hawks a look on a two-man advantage to get back in the game. There’s no reason for it. And once the Hawks got it to 2-1, did you really doubt the Ducks would run around their own zone like a kindergarten game of football and the Hawks would find the equalizer? No, of course you didn’t.

    You really couldn’t ask for a more clear illustration about the difference between these two teams. One will just find a way to insert thumb in its ass. The other still knows how to get it done when they need to.

    TO THE BLUFFS!

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  • Back To The Scene Of The Crime: Hawks at Ducks Preview/Bears Celebration Continued

    250px-Ozymandias vs. donald-duck-dunn-620x413

    PUCK DROP: 4pm Central

    TV/RADIO: WGN, NBCSN, WGN Radio

    DUCK TALES (Woohoo): Anaheim Calling

    Ducks Stats

    Ducks War On Ice

    Some games you know that the opponent has had circled on the schedule, even if the Hawks know better than to make too much of a regular season game. Then again, the Ducks are so practiced at seeing teams that had beaten them in a Game 7 the previous year maybe they don’t make that much of a deal out of it anymore. Either way, the Hawks return to Anaheim for the first time since they got to partake in the annual giveaway of a playoff series in Orange County last spring.

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  • You’ve Got to Let the Wine Breathe: Blackhawks 5, Sharks 2

    You’ve Got to Let the Wine Breathe: Blackhawks 5, Sharks 2

    Box Score

    Event Summary

    War on Ice

    Natural Stat Trick

    The Wednesday before Thanksgiving game against the Sharks always holds a special place in my heart, if only because of the game in 2009-2010 when Marian Hossa made his Blackhawks debut and the Hawks kicked the Sharks all over the ice to the tune of a 7-2 win. That was truly a beating.

    This one looked like it may go down the same path. Unfortunately, Marian Hossa wasn’t as accurate in his shoosting and the Hawks were giving the Sharks plenty of opportunities to hang around by taking bad penalties.

    Instead, the Hawks merely beat the Sharks all over the ice 5-on-5 with pretty much everyone on the roster contributing in some way. The perfect kind of win to wash out any lingering bitterness of the trip to Western Canada.

    How did it happen?

    Let’s go.

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  • Turn It Up: Hawks at Sharks Preview/Avoiding Your Family

    250px-Ozymandias vs. shark

    PUCK DROP: 9pm Central

    TV/RADIO: NBCSN, WGN Radio

    CAGE IN THE WATER: You know what… just follow @stace_ofbase on Twitter. I have no idea who’s writing Fear The Fin these days. 

    The 2nd leg of the annual Circus Trip begins tonight, and the degree of difficulty goes up a bit for the Men of Four Feathers as they will face the hottest team in the league in San Jose, before doubling up in SoCal on the weekend with what might be the only legitimate teams in the Pacific (whatever the Ducks record might be). Considering the Hawks have only started this trip 1-1-1, it might look a little daunting.

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  • Fireside Chat

    Fireside Chat

    And here we go again.

    It’s no secret that hockey culture is weird, bad and stupid. Amazingly, though, it’s actually improved by leaps and bounds since we took to the internet to air our grievances. (2008 if you’re keeping score at home) Have you realized we are living in a world where fighting all but seems to have disappeared and the rats aren’t taking over? So bizarre that Joel Quenneville is quoted in a story like that, right?

    There haven’t been any #hottakes decrying the lack of tradition or fear mongering over all the dirty hits that “may” occur. Nope. The fact that we’ve nary heard a peep is what makes it all so refreshing.

    So there’s that. (more…)

  • Morning Links 11/25/2015

    Morning Links 11/25/2015

    That’s alot of pucks:Chicago Tribune

    Bad:SI

    Early and Often:NHL

    Look me in the eye and tell me..NBC

    Black Wednesday Tradition:CBS

    Cash drives innovation:ST

     

  • Live From The Five Hole – Station (Of Base)

    While the Hawks are presumably getting their fun in now in Vegas before the league begins its newly announced cocaine testing program, we we were actually productive in assessing the first half of this trip, but also turning an eye to California. To assist us in that, Sharks contributor @stace_ofbase took time to join us. Enjoy.

     

    Direct Download Link

  • High On The Hog: Bunched Up In The Central Division

    High On The Hog: Bunched Up In The Central Division

    The Rockford IceHogs, the Blackhawks AHL affiliate in Winnebago County, have found themselves in a pretty competitive Central Division so far in 2015-16. If the first two months of the season are any indication, finishing at the top of the eight-team division may be a tall order.

    Rockford’s 10-4-1-2 record and .676 points percentage would be good enough for second or third in any of the AHL’s other three divisions. In the Central, however, the IceHogs mark is only good enough for fourth.

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  • Morning Links 11.23.2015

    Morning Links 11.23.2015

    They were due:CBC

    For the long haul:NBC

    Quick trip to the sportsbook:ST

    That escalated quickly:SCH

    Into the unknown:SN