Faxes from Uncle Dale

Author: Sam Fels

  • Steers And Queers/They Don’t Grow In The Desert: Hawks 1 – Stars 1 (Hawks win Jenga)/Hawks at Yotes Preview

    Steers And Queers/They Don’t Grow In The Desert: Hawks 1 – Stars 1 (Hawks win Jenga)/Hawks at Yotes Preview

    With the Hawks doing a rare Friday-Saturday night double, we’re going to combine our wrap and preview on the pivot. Hopefully we don’t pull a muscle.

    There’s not too much to say about last night’s “win.” Though the Hawks have gotten smacked by Colorado and Nashville recently, yesterday’s game certainly felt like the sloppiest they’ve played. I waited for the Hawks to be able to connect on three straight passes at any point. I’m still waiting. Two seemed a struggle. Luckily for the Hawks, the Stars weren’t any better. Everything was kind of frantic and chances basically came out of whatever team was able to rugby-scrum their way toward the other team’s net. This game would have caused Herb Brooks to break out his “monkeys humping a football” line.

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  • Easy Peasey Japanesey: Hawks 5 – Oilers 1

    Easy Peasey Japanesey: Hawks 5 – Oilers 1

    We still fear games against the Oilers after the trauma of the ’11-’12 season, especially the carnival ride of the games at Rexall Place that season, but it hasn’t really been the case the past two season. Oh sure, the Oil got one last year at the UC in a total clown college of a game. But other than that they’ve been batting practice fastballs for the Hawks. And you know pretty much whether it will be or not by the 1st period. As soon as Jonathan Toews arrogantly deposited his shorty in the 1st, you knew how tonight would go.

    Let’s not wait around.

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  • Any Shade Of Lipstick: Hawks 2 – Canucks 1

    Any Shade Of Lipstick: Hawks 2 – Canucks 1

    Thanks for pardoning the Saturday night wrap. You know how these things go.

    While the players said different on both sides, and there was still some yapping and some gatherings after whistles, there’s definitely some heat out of the Hawks-Canucks rivalry. As more and more distance is put between the Playoff Trilogy, and each team has more and more its own things to deal with, that’s going to continue. It was always a rivalry built on this crop of players, and the more they change then it will fade out.

    That doesn’t mean last night’s win didn’t feel particularly good, because it did. Maybe it’s partly because it was Vancouver, and maybe it was beating another team almost certainly using the game as a measuring stick. It was weird, until taking the lead I thought the Hawks were carrying most of the play. But as soon as they were up 2-1 it was bunker time, even though they weren’t the team that had played the night before. But whatever works, right?

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  • Friday Grinds My Gears

    Friday Grinds My Gears

    The NHL always has an annoying, league-wide storyline going. Sometimes it’s head shots. Others it’s hits from behind. Sometimes it’s concussion protocol, or goalie gear, or TV show overdose, whatever.

    But the one that’s annoying me the most right now, and has for a long, long time, is the uproar over how many games are going to shootouts. Add to that the silly OT proposals to try and remedy this, and I’m about ready to put on an Argonauts jersey and talking about oral sex (too soon?).

    You know the problem. This season, the amount of games going to a shootout has risen, and it’s getting ridiculous. So the solutions have been thrown around. 3-on-3 in OT after 4-on-4, which sounds only slightly less gimmicky than the shootout. Have the teams switch ends for the long change. Whatever else.

    It’s all stupid. Just end the fucking thing in a tie.

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  • Hawks at Jets 3rd Period Thread

    Hey, don’t you know it’s a waste of your day
    Caught up in endless solutions
    That have no meaning, just another hunch
    Based upon jumping conclusions

  • Hawks at Jets 2nd Period Thread

    Pow! Right between the eyes
    Oh, how nature loves her little surprises
    Wow! It all seems so logical now
    It’s just one of her better disguises

  • Hawks at Jets 1st Period Thread

    Sometimes I can’t help the feeling that I’m
    Living a life of illusion
    And oh, why can’t we let it be
    And see through the hole in this wall of confusion

  • Jet City Woman: Hawks at Jets Preview/Pregame Thread/Neti Pot Discussion

    Hawk Wrestler vs. jet_aug_2006_cover_72dpi

    FACEOFF: 7pm Central

    TV/RADIO: CSN, WGN Radio 720

    SO VERY, VERY COLD: Arctic Ice Hockey

    WHERE YOU SHOULD WATCH: At The Piggery (Irving and Ashland) With Us

    For the second time in a week, the Hawks will look to bounce back after an ugly loss, however bad you actually believe Tuesday’s loss to be. On Sunday, they returned from the skewering in Nashville to smother the Sharks. Needless to say, the Jets are not the Sharks. See what I did there?

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  • Hey Kids, Where Are You?

    Hey Kids, Where Are You?

    Organizational round-up Wednesday is what it’s become. Let’s get to it, starting in the juniors up in the hinterlands.

    In the Q, Dillon Fournier was a -1 in two games for Rouyn-Noranda. He was also named to the QMJHL team for the Subway Series against Team Russia. For those who don’t know, the Subway Series is six games, two games each from an All-star team of each junior league, against Team Russia. It’s a sort of precursor for Canada to see who will compete for the World Junior roster. From what I’ve seen Fournier won’t be making Team Canada, but I suppose you never know. On the year Fournier is 7-10-17 and +16 in 22 games.

    Also in the Q at Victoriaville, Brandon Whitney went 1-1 in two stars, but only gave up four goals total (two in each) on 73 shots. The numbers on the year are still unsightly, at 3.62 GAA and .896 SV%. But the poor kid is seeing over 40 shots per game, so he may be puck-shocked soon.

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  • Some Will Die In Hot Pursuit: Hawks 1 – Avs 5

    Some Will Die In Hot Pursuit: Hawks 1 – Avs 5

    In a season where I’ve begged coach and players to look at the big picture and not react game to game, I’m going to try and take the same tack. Sure, some of us wanted this one a little more than we might for any other regular season game. That’s because A) it’s always satisfying to see a team getting too much hype get its market correction (and I saw nothing tonight that convinced me the Avs won’t, as weird as that sounds in a 5-1 dry heave) and B) because the Avs are a garbage organization that deserves that correction. But it didn’t happen, and I don’t want to kick things over games in November.

    And that scoreline tells a story that I’m not sure the game follows. Credit to Colorado who were opportunistic and their goalie Drunky McPunchPunch was stellar (must be easy at home where it’s easier to imagine the puck as a woman’s face). Just because you present a team with most of its chances doesn’t mean they don’t have to convert them and the Avs did.

    But the Hawks… well, it was there. Could have been so much different. If one very important player wasn’t huffing paint, it very well might have been. Let’s get to the bullets..

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