Everything Else

Leave it to Toronto. The Maple Leafs have been the hairy asshole of the NHL for the better part of a century now, yet they continue to claim themselves as some kind of important, historic NHL organization. The media that covers the team has ruined hockey coverage. Their fans ruined hockey Twitter. And now, after years of exploiting the ever-living shit of the LTIR cap exception, the team may have just managed to screw things up for the whole league in that regard.

The Leafs are hardly the only team to have circumvented the salary cap with the LTIR exception, but they’re without a doubt the worst offender. Because Maple Leaf Sports and Entertainment essentially prints Loonies (which is probably a down market at this point in and of itself), they’ve been unafraid to write checks to players that they have no intent on playing. Hell, they traded for Nathan Horton for the sole purpose of getting LTIR relief, and more recently have been keeping an apparently entirely healthy Joffrey Lupul off the ice for the cap relief and to make room for the New Kids From The Block cover band that makes up their forward group.

Everything Else

Now in the refractory period between the hoisting of The Chalice and the flurry of activity that comes at the Draft, a slow trickle of minor news has been seeping out across the league. Vegas is apparently a go, without the approval of Nevada Gaming Control somehow. Randy Carlyle is hilariously the head coach of the Ducks again, apparently at the behest of the refusing-to-go-away Teemu Selanne. The Flames seem to be zeroing in on Glen Gulutzan, who is not to be confused with any number of Elaine’s dipshit boyfriends on Seinfeld, but actually was last seen coaching the Stars in the pre-Genius Jim Nill era to nowhere in particular.

But on a day where bullshit like this constitutes news, one seemingly minor thing crossed the wire that could have gone unnoticed at any other time during the year, and that’s piece of shit with teeth Matthew Barnaby leaving his post on the NHL Network on SiriusXM to be an assistant coach for the OHL’s Kitchener Rangers. This is just so disgustingly perfect.