Faxes from Uncle Dale

Author: Sam Fels

  • Hawks at Bruins Game 6 1st Period Thread

    yeah, we can take it
    good and loose on an endless spree
    good because we made it
    and when momma’s not around
    there’s no telling what we’ll do when we’re free

  • We Can Take It Inside: Hawks at Bruins Game 6 Preview/Pregame Thread/Oxygen Bar Crawl

    Hawk Wrestler vs. bruins country bear jamboroo

    FACEOFF: 7:22pm Central
    TV/RADIO:     NBC, CBC, RDS, WGN 720am
    ON THE CHOPPING BLOCK:     Days of Y’Orr, Stanley Cup Of Chowder

    If you’ll allow us to mix band metaphors: It’s right outside your door….

    Or at least it will be. Lord Stanley’s favorite beer mug will enter the building sometime tonight while the two teams are on the ice, and it can only be brought out of the box by the men with white gloves to be given to someone in a white jersey. And we now know that someone will be the one with the “C”, if it breaks that way.

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  • Lick And A Promise: Bruins 1 – Hawks 3 (Hawks lead 3-2)

    Lick And A Promise: Bruins 1 – Hawks 3 (Hawks lead 3-2)

    I remember this from three years ago.

    I remember when they flash that “1” all around the U.C. I remember the chills you get when you see it. Because though we spend most of our days dreaming about the Hawks winning The Chalice, and though that thought infuriates our bosses or significant others or whoever else because you are pretty much useless in any other way when thinking about it, when you see that “1”, it becomes all too real. It’s right there. You feel like you can touch it. It’s not just theory any more. It’s like when you first step into that girl’s/guy’s apartment that you’ve been chasing for so long. It’s not just a dream or a wish. There’s so little to execute now to have what you dared not speak of before. IT COULD REALLY HAPPEN AND OH MY GOD JUST BREATHE AND ALL I HAVE TO DO IS NOT CRIMINALLY FUCK UP AND….

    And yet…there’s still so far to go.

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  • Something Flips The Switch And I Collpase Inside

    Just cleaning up some stuff from last night, whatever that was. Or maybe trying to sort out why I’m not dead yet. I should be. Maybe that’s waiting for the conclusion of this madness.

    I’ve said all along this series that I will no longer doubt this team. That every time I felt the axe about to fall I would no longer accept that it was coming down upon them. Of course, I can’t actually follow my words, because after the Looney Tunes marathon of last night I once again felt the cold chill and was ready to embrace it. No way could they find the reserve to conjure up one more goal in OT with a ravenous Bruins team looking sure to score on the first clean look they got. And yet the Hawks just seem to have this We’re-Not-Fucking-Losing gear that they can bring out when they absolutely have to have it. While I hate comparisons to the 2010 team, and will even if they end up accomplishing the same thing, I will say this version’s balls are bigger because they don’t have as much talent to simply break teams over time. But no one’s told them that, and no one should.

    I’ll learn too late. And that will probably be just fine with everyone if it keeps going the way it has when I lose the faith.

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  • Hawks at Bruins Game 4 3rd Period Thread

    Don’t know why I let you leave me
    Honey I don’t know
    See its hard to see lovin’ comin baby
    But I have a way to see it go

  • Hawks at Bruins Game 4 2nd Period Thread

    I let ya slip on from me baby
    I let ya walk on by,
    Shoulda loved, you told me
    I refused to love, I let it die

  • Hawks at Bruins Game 4 1st Period Thread

    Never thought about tomorrow
    Seemed like a long time to come
    How could I be so blind, baby
    Not to see you were the one

  • Digging For Fire: Hawks at Bruins Game 4 Preview/Pregame Thread/Game Fishing Expedition

    Hawk Wrestler vs. bruins country bear jamboroo

    FACEOFF: 7:22pm (or thereabouts) Central
    TV/RADIO: NBC, CBC, WGN 720am
    WICKED PISSAH: Days Of Y’Orr, Stanley Cup Of Chowder

    We havin’ fun yet?

    Obviously, things haven’t been this tense or looked this bleak since….oh right, about a month ago. But obviously the temperature is turned up because of THE FINAL and the opponent. The Bruins look more imposing than an Army Ranger after he catches you flirting with his girlfriend. Everyone’s losing their shit. There’s a controversy with one of the Hawks’ stars. We’re all digging for excuses and reasons.

    And yet, it’s 2-1 and a solid road game tonight hits the reset button on the whole thing. So maybe it’s not so bad?

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  • You Talk About Things That Nobody Cares

    Just some things to clean up after Game 3 before we turn toward what’s ahead in Game 4.

    -This Hossa injury thing is just weird and I can’t believe it’s not getting the screws turned to Quenneville. Actually, I can totally believe it because it’s long been accepted in hockey circles that your coach can spill out pure drivel and everyone will just dismiss it as him simply being “hockey” or “Canadian.” Jesus, you’d think a lot of Canadians would take great offense at that, because though I don’t know that many I’m pretty sure an overwhelming amount of them are articulate and pretty intelligent.

    If it was known well before that Hossa might not go, then not having Smith take the warm up when Mayers already was is just….well isn’t it ridiculous? Smith hasn’t played a game since the last game of the season. Doesn’t he need as much time on the ice as possible? You’re already hedging your Hossa bets by having Mayers skate in the warmup. I was under the impression that anyone who has the slightest chance of playing takes the warmup just for this exact purpose.

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  • Some Day There’ll Be A Cure For Pain: Hawks 0 – Bruins 2 (B’s lead 2-1)

    Some Day There’ll Be A Cure For Pain: Hawks 0 – Bruins 2 (B’s lead 2-1)

    I’m not sure where to start this. I think the best place is to separate the optics of it from what the reality might be.

    I understand what some people are seeing. Because the Bruins are bigger, their hits tend to knock Hawks to the ice, whereas the Hawks’ don’t. Because the B’s are so good defensively, even when the play is even the Hawks aren’t creating chance after chance (even though the B’s actually aren’t creating that much either). There’s this impression that it should always look like the 1st period of Game 2, but the Bruins are too good for that. The Hawks can’t get to rebounds that are there, Rask isn’t working all that hard, I can see where some people might mistake it for an ass-kicking. But it just doesn’t feel to me that’s what what we’ve witnessed here.

    Let’s just get to the bullets and we’ll see if I can’t prove my point:

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