Faxes from Uncle Dale

Author: Sam Fels

  • Running Out Of Space On Garbage Island

    Running Out Of Space On Garbage Island

    Boy, it hasn’t been the best week for goalies to reward my faith in the sport or humanity, has it?

    Though I can’t tell you how delighted I am that on the day after Brian Burke wrote his article in USA Today defending fighting and talking about how “The Code” would solve everything if only we would let it, Ray Emery and the Flyers pretty much shit all over it. Even though Emery thinks he was in line with “The Code” because he told Braden Holtby he was going to punch him regardless of what Holtby thought. Oh wow Razor!  You beat up a guy who wasn’t trying to fight you! HOW TOUGH YOU ARE! Maybe next you can go brag about how you scored with your own girlfriend after!

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  • Hawks at Jets 3rd Period Thread

    Here comes that beer from last night again…

  • Hawks at Jets 2nd Period Thread

    Whoops.

  • Hawks at Jets 1st Period Thread

    Have at it.

  • From Your First Cigarette To Your Last Dyin’ Day: Hawks at Jets Preview/Pregame Thread/Pit Fight

    AltLogo_medium vs. KennySmithAgent

    FACEOFF: 2pm Central

    TV/RADIO: WGN for both

    SO VERY, VERY COLD: Arctic Ice Hockey

    Hard to believe because the Jets have now been in existence for three years, but this will be the Hawks first trip to the MTS Center (Centre?). Or at least in the regular season. Of course, the narrative is all about Jonathan Toews coming home to play his first regular season game in his hometown and all that. Whatever. We’ve done this enough with the two trips Patrick Kane has made to Buffalo.

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  • Grinds My Gears – Throw Varly Out and Brian Burke

    Grinds My Gears – Throw Varly Out and Brian Burke

    I know what happens when you don’t wait around for actual convictions and the whole “innocent until proven guilty” premise that our country is kind of built on. But last night touched a very raw nerve that I have when it comes to domestic abuse and violence against women perpetrated by athletes. So I’m going to jump all that.

    I would love nothing more than Gary Bettman to suspend Semyon Varlamov for 40 games, or 80, or more, and for the players’ union to do absolutely nothing about it.

    But of course, we don’t live in that fantasy world where scumbags like Varlamov get what they assuredly deserve.

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  • 80’s Revival: Sens 5 – Hawks 6

    80’s Revival: Sens 5 – Hawks 6

    I know a lot of you are new fans, or are just too young to remember. But if you weren’t there and ever wondered what hockey was like in the late 80’s or early 90’s, here you go. The neutral zone is nothing more than a launch pad, the goaltenders are making it up as they go and generally getting it wrong, the backchecking doesn’t even reach the level of a suggestion, and basically the last team to have the puck wins. It drives coaches nuts, but man is it entertaining. Luckily, the Hawks came out on the right side of this one.

    Toews will take the plaudits, but everyone was a Pollack painting tonight, doing a lot of good and a lot of bad. But hey, it’s October, and the Hawks don’t have to be perfect. Especially when they’re still getting points. Shall we move on to the bullets? Yes, we shall.

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  • Hawks at Wild 3rd Period Thread

    I want the principles of a timeless muse
    I want to eradicate my negative views
    And get rid of those people who are always on a down

  • Hawks at Wild 2nd Period Thread

    I don’t want pain, I want to walk not be carried
    I don’t want to give it up, I want to stay married
    I ain’t no dog tied to a parked car

  • Hawks at Wild 1st Period Thread

    I don’t like guilt be it stoned or stupid
    drunk and disorderly I ain’t no cupid
    Two years ago today I was arrested on Christmas Eve